Bombarded in These Foolish Things

March 11, 2021, 4:50 p.m.
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Public

There are SO many resources for cancer. Like, so many things that my head is spinning. I just got off the phone a little while ago with a nurse patient advocate (I think that’s what she called herself?) from the hospital where I had my surgery and she was super kind and knowledgeable and wants to email me about a million resources that I can use while I’m going through treatment.

I know I’m a little bit in denial and that’s what keeps me from curling up into a little ball and melting to the ground in a puddle, but FUCK. It’s all soooooo much. What the hell? How will I navigate this?

I do like that there’s a tool that I might be able to use to help the friends who want to help me. Like, there’s a scheduling thing that I can put in requests if people want to bring food or help with a ride or whatever, and I have SO many people asking how they can help and right now I just don’t even know what to tell them. Whatever this tool is might help because I can set it up for the future and schedule things like food or supplies that I might want right after chemo. Things like that.

But I don’t even KNOW how this is going to go, you know?

How do people even do this? I mean, I know…you just DO IT. But wow.

Did I tell you that I talked to SexyPants? I needed to tell him the string-in-the-butt story because he has a string-in-the-dick story (from a kidney stone surgery) that’s kind of weirdly similar and I needed some levity and he is the only person who would understand.

I’d forgotten that his dad died from colon cancer so when I started telling the story I just kind of matter-of-fact blurted out that little fact and he got super, super emotional and…yeah.

I’m glad I’m at work this week - even though there’s stupid shit still happening, I can’t imagine what I’d be like if I were just sitting at home waiting to start chemo. I need this. Plus, some girls at the office want me to go to an outdoor patio little happy hour and I haven’t done a happy hour in ten thousand years, so…I’m going to do it. And I’m going to like it!

I’m grateful for today and for pushy co-workers who want to get me out before the shit hits. Which is funny because, didn’t I just have surgery?? Wasn’t that shit too? I swear, it seems like sooooooo long ago.

Okay, time to begin closing up shop and clearing my mind of worry…

Love,
GS

Deleted user ⋅ March 11, 2021

That tool sounds interesting! Look at it this way: It's pretty amazing that so many people have come forward with offers that you may have to schedule them. :-)

Someone here on PB had a string-in-the-dick story. He thought the string would only be something like 2.7 cm, if I recall correctly. Actually, as it goes from the kidney, down the tube, and into the bladder, it was more like 27 cm. Pesky decimal point!

Satine ⋅ March 11, 2021

I am thinking of you every day.

Deleted user ⋅ March 11, 2021

Everyone wonders how they'll make it through, how they'll figure it out, and somehow they do. How wonderful that you have friends and family that are supporting and loving you. Thinking of you as you figure out how to navigate this. 💓