NJM 2020, Entry 18 - While We Wait for Relief* in These Foolish Things

See the update in bold in the second bullet about dating!!

Good morning, all. How are we doing today?

How about some more bullets of random stuff on a Wednesday, hm?

• don’t know if it’s a placebo effect, and I really should wait until tonight and see how I feel then, but last night I took an iron supplement that was recommended by [Athena] to see if it would help with my energy levels and I feel amazing this morning! I was able to get out of bed with little effort, do my Official Morning Routine(™), drop the kid off at doggy daycare and start my day with plenty of energy to spare. I’ve got some physical work to do here at the office and I’ll be monitoring myself today. Let’s hope that maybe iron is the energy kick I need. I’ve known I am anemic since the injury last year. It would be great to solve that issue with this simple fix. We’ll see!

• So. Got the new iphone last night and I’m back up and running! Over the last couple of days I have been in communication with a potential Bumble date. He was cute and seemed really excited about me. The day before yesterday, he sent me a good, long message and then gave me his phone number AND his last name - I guess to let me know that it was okay to check him out on the socials. I sent my number back and told him I’d love to talk on the phone. He then wrote back and asked me if I’d ever been married, for how long, and how long I’d been divorced. So I replied that I’d never been married but have had a few important long-term relationships and asked the same questions back to him. Today I checked the app and he’d deleted me. So…neat.

Update!! I was texting with another guy today who I matched with yesterday. We were talking all about whiskey tasting and such and he suggested we meet for a drink. I told him sure, as long as he was okay with socially distanced and outdoors because I visit my elderly parents every weekend. Guess how he replied? Yep. He deleted me.

• What else, what else? Oh yeah, the Covid is running rampant in this area (especially in the area where my office is located), and I’m getting increasingly worried about everybody coming back into the office after Thanksgiving. It’s been super nice having the whole place to myself, and even though I knew it wouldn’t be forever, I can just picture a clusterfuck of Covid immediately after the holiday. I wish I could stop thinking/writing about this but I just can’t with all that’s going on. While I’m thrilled that there are now vaccines that we are about to get, I know it’s going to me MONTHS until we are in the clear. The company is running smoothly with the corp office working remotely. Why do we have to risk it all NOW when we are so close? I don’t understand.

• And yes, yesterday it was pointed out to me that if I need to take DRUGS to get through some particular issues with my work then I’m doing it all wrong. It’s true and I agree with that 100%, but I’m in this weird stuck place and feel so much pressure to figure it all out. A friend posted a Carl Jung quote on IG yesterday and it made me think: “What did you do as a child that made the hours pass like minutes? Herein lies the key to your earthly pursuits”. I loved to craft and make things. I loved colors. I loved to play dress up. I loved to play teacher. I mean, much of that is what I do now - I just get so bogged down with a lot of other stuff here that makes me cringe (like dealing with aggressive, sometimes handsy salespeople among other issues) and want to do drugs. How do I get to the happy place? Bulldog would say that I need to be working for myself. But right now I have this.

And with that thought comes the fact that I have stuff to do now. Also, just FYI, the call yesterday was not bad at all! Glad I didn’t bring the hard stuff to work with me yesterday!

Here’s to higher energy levels, healthy living, and NO COVID today…
GS

Last updated November 19, 2020