On my bedroom floor lie a pile of cloths. Glancing at them wishing they had been yours. My mind races, yet my body can not manage courage to lift a single finger. Silent tears fall onto my cheeks in a beautifully tragic motion.
through blurry blue eyes. I catch a glimpse of my worn hands. Remembering how it felt to hold yours. Your warm hands used to engulf me in such a Sincere nature.
Your voice shook when you told me I would be alright. Always was your voice in my ear healing my fresh open wounds.
You pored your heart out, tore out all emotions to lay them on the table, right in-front of my eyes. yet I could not see, I was blind then. Now I am seeing behind blurry tears.
That song we once loved, we danced all night. Now stuck on repeat, but no longer is a happy tune. I am trapped, buried inside my own thoughts. Dealing with devils alone, on my own. Why did you leave me to fend for myself? When will you come back?
Maybe a pill will drain my shame. Maybe something besides you will subside my pain. You once promised forever. Now I am wise enough to realize forever is only a myth. However this does not make a shattered promise hurt any less.
I have one last desperate plea inside of me. The devils you fought off have been growing since you left. Have I been losing it completely? Losing my sanity. Or is it fashioned by the worst of me?
I have seen pictures you have taken of you smiling with your new friends. In the meantime I am stuck here crying, holding onto pictures I have felt of you and I. Now those pictures are only moments in the past. Only memories of what I lost.
When people look at me they see a beautiful girl with a sweet smile upon her lips. Not one person gets close enough to see that my eyes don't shine like they once did. no clue how often I cry, not the slightest idea how often I feel like screaming at the top of my lungs. Maybe if I scream loud enough I will burst. Yet you broke my walls I allowed you to get close enough to see under my mask. You helped me at four in the morning when I needed someone.
Once you had been there, not anymore. I could write and write and write until I use up all of the words, until I filled the page, but it wouldn’t bring you back...

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