I got Dustin to kiss me last night at Shades. We were being snuggly and quiet for a long time, and I made it perfectly obvious that I wanted to kiss him, and he had his head tilted down so that I couldn't. I licked the ridge of his ear, and sucked his earlobe a bit. He was still and quiet. We stayed in a stand-off for a while.
"So, I hear what you're saying," I said. We both laughed, because neither of us had said anything for about a half an hour. "But I don't think it's a problem. I'm just sayin."
"I don't think I'm in a mental state to make that kind of decision."
"That's fair."
And we went back to talking and snuggling, but I was still being very obvious and flirty. He has this way of touching me that will turn me on no matter what I'm doing. He was enjoying playing around with that. I gave him a big hug, and it felt like home. We thanked each other, and it was lovely. Then he had to leave, and he gave me one sweet kiss.
And after the kiss, I still felt good. And when I walked away, it wasn't like I was aching to just have more more more. I was ready to go home. It wasn't sad that I was leaving. I was just happy. I had a few more dances, and they were really nice.
It's good that it's been months since I've woken up and been sad about him. I feel like this is a test, to see if I'll make it weird at all between now and his birthday party.
Oh, and he's been interviewing for jobs. There's one in particular that he wants, and it's an hour further south than where he lives now. It seems like he's admitted to himself that he is not moving to Seattle any time soon.
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