With the way my relationships with women I loved in 2018 ended, I decided that I needed to step back a little. I stretched myself thin thinking I could handle all the things that were occurring in my life and then try to distract myself by helping these girls with their problems too. My 2019 has been pretty quiet on the dating front.
Except for this one. We’re going to refer to her as “Christy” because she still doesn’t know I have this blog/journal and well…she just found my twitter recently and I had to do a lot of damage control on that front so…let’s not refer to her in case this still ends terribly.
Christy is a cam girl and avid cosplayer. A normal human probably doesn’t understand either of these things. Christy makes money by taking pictures and videos and sending them to people that pay for her content. Yes, sometimes she’s nude. Sure, it could be thought of as pornography. I applaud her for knowing how to make money off of people that are willing to give it. That’s the cam girl part. Cosplay is when one dresses up to look like someone else from a movie, book, video game, anime, etc. So, to tie it all together, Christy pays for her graduate school at UW by taking photos of her dressed up as Harley Quinn or Ariel from the Little Mermaid and sending them off to middle aged men locked up in their basements with a sock and a tube of vaseline - at least that’s what I picture happening.
The way in which I met Christy was interesting - she had matched with me on a social dating site, and we had started talking about our common likes in music, movies, food and then we met on state street one day; stopped in my favorite coffee shop across from my old job and sat and talked for hours. We made each other laugh over a ton of ridiculous stories and I shared my past in terms of laughable relationship snafus and terrible drunken ideas. Christy and I went out to eat, she ordered a Jameson and instantly I knew that this was going to be a complicated trip. I explained why I wasn’t and haven’t been drinking and she immediately asked if I wanted her to stop, that she was just trying to have one or two to give her the courage to have me over (this girl is beyond pretty and by my faces contrast, I should be the one every time needing the liquid courage for my ugly mug.) I told her how obnoxious she was being by thinking that I wasn’t interested in her at all and after another hour or so of talking and her finishing a drink, she took me to her place.
What I walked into was…something I have only seen in dreams, youtube videos and homemade pornos on pornhub. There were wigs, makeup, costumes, everywhere. Her second bedroom just had a bed, with about five different cameras set up in the room, and on the floor were different sheets; rubber, flannel, black cotton, and I quickly figured out that I was getting into old territory with my ex that was a stripper. Eerily familiar and just as concerning and scary. Her black furry cat was eye fucking me on the couch. What in gods name was I fucking doing here?!?
As I made myself comfortable, drinking a Dr. Pepper (God I was already falling for this one) she came out of her room fully dressed like Black Widow from the Avengers - leather bodysuit, bright red wig, and handcuffs in her hand. People. This is my fantasy and I am living it. Sparing all the details, I spent almost 24 hours with her, I had had the day off and well, being summer with no school and shooting videos whenever she wanted, she was free, so we spent a fair amount of time together. We definitely bonded and liked each other from the get go.
Christy and I spent a good amount of May and June together, and I started learning more and more about her. Some of it well, was concerning to me at least. This girl was absolutely entranced by astrology, horoscopes, tarot reading, the kind of religion that the other organized religions tell you is ‘the devil.’ Myself, being an excommunicated Mormon, was like, fuck that, I mean, I’m not buying it but if she thinks we’re going to have mind blowing sex because the stars aligned and my houses were in order, I could get behind it. The practices became a lot to handle though. Candles, cards, star charts, moon patterns, this was all shit I made fun of lesser women I had liked before. Somehow though, Christy captivated me.
Then I was clued into this thing she called ‘moon water.’ Apparently, the belief was that if you left out water under a full moon, the beams of light ‘blessed’ the water with healing energies and magical powers. Clearly, I scoffed and laughed but because I really liked this girl, I bought into the trick and I drank some. I also started telling people about this ludicrous idea I was presented and mocked it with a bunch of my friends. “It’s supposed to change luck? Water? Moon beams? Jesus Christ, Posso.” The sexual stuff with this girl was amazing. I hadn’t been riding a high like that since before my testicular cancer. I was out at the casino the next night, to kill some time and blow off some steam from dealing with people all day. Christy was filming until late so I figured, I had a free hundred dollars in play from the casino, might as well go do that. I sat down at a slot machine I liked playing. It was a multi denominational machine (meaning that you could bet 1 cent, 2 cents, 5 cents, or 10 cents, and at either 50,100,150,200 or 250 credits) thinking I was going to play for a penny betting 250 credits, which would be $2.50. I didn’t look at the settings though and I was betting 250 lines at 10 cents…$25. $25 for one spin of a slot machine. In one spin I lost a tank of gas. After I noticed this I was pissed, but I have most definitely spent $100 in shittier ways, so I decided to just spin out the rest of the $100 at $25 a spin. My very next spin, the machine froze, and when the computer caught up, there was a screen that flashed that said “Call Attendant, Jackpot $18.000”
I had just hit a jackpot for eighteen thousand dollars.
I had taxes taken out so I wouldn’t have to worry later, and out I walked of the casino with an envelope filled with $10,100 in cash. I was elated and drove immediately to Christy’s to tell her the news. Her first response after a squeal of joy:
“See, I told you moon water was real.”
Shortly after, I told her I didn’t see myself being able to date her because it wasn’t fair to her that I would openly mock all these little things she put so much faith and belief in, that it wasn’t fair to her to belittle her things she cared about. She refused though, we took some time apart to just talk and put other things aside to see if we liked each other and now we see each other, often still, to talk and causally hook up.
She reminded me yesterday though, the next full moon is August 15th. Get your water ready.