Lost myself just thinking in Happy trails from DE
- June 22, 2019, 1:57 a.m.
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- Public
Today at work we had a 2.5 hour inservice fair which was just about as fun as it sounds. We went over basically every topic you could think of that pertains to hospital facilities… bloodborne pathogens, ppe, lock out tag out, and good old sexual harassment.
I was sitting with our cafe guy rob who I’ve told a little bit about our boss and he looks over and jokingly says it’s your time to shine! So I laughed a bit and decided I would ask the one question that was bothering me the most
what happens if you’re being continually sexually harassed, report it, but the person who is harassing you lies or gets out of it and you’re stuck working with them?
The answer wasn’t totally straight forward, the nurse speaker basically said to keep going to the next chain of command until something is done. She said the harasser will most likely lie but you need to go above them. If it’s your direct supervisor you find another building supervisor in another department.
It was a tad bit uncomfortable… I don’t believe anyone there thought I was asking a hypothetical questions and they all seemed very concerned for me. I guess that should be comforting but it was the opposite.
When we were getting ready for the next station our chaplain stopped me and told me he would be more than happy to speak to me and help me in any way he could and I instantly wanted to cry because he’s never spoken to me before, and well I get over emotional with religious figures.
Rob also stopped me and said he didnt realize it was that bad and if I wanted him to he would talk to him and put a stop to it.
I know my boss is wrong, and is a creep of the highest magnitude, so why do I feel so awful about doing anything about it?
He could lose his job, and I dont want that responsibility. I don’t want anyone to lose their position because of me.
I also don’t want the staff to find out and think I’m some weak baby who can’t take a joke. I mean, I’m pretty thick skinned, far from prude, and I’m not easily offended in the slightest.
I know he’s in the wrong, not me, but a part of me also thinks I haven’t made it abundantly clear. I told him he was being inappropriate. But I didn’t slam my foot on the ground and scream shut the fuck up about your dick, I don’t want to hear it! I am most certainly not asking for it or entertaining it, but maybe I’m doing something wrong.
I hate that hes put me in this situation.
I hate that part of me thinks, it’s just words. He hasn’t tried to touch you yet, it hasnt gotten that bad. He’s hugged you a few times but nothing outlandish, you can deal with a little words.
What a mess of a situation. I dont want to be in any situation, I just want to put in my 8 hours and go home. He didnt say anything bad to me today so I guess there’s that
Deleted user ⋅ June 22, 2019
It is not your responsibility if he loses his job, it is his. The fault can lie only with him. You’re not the one doing anything wrong. You shouldn’t have to scream it at him, he’s a grown man who has been told you find it highly inappropriate. That’s not making yourself unclear, that’s being professional and assertive.
DE_juleaha ⋅ June 22, 2019
Totally not your responsibility/burden if he loses his job.
Jobs are privileges and not rights. If he wanted/wants to keep it then he should be a respectful human being and not a scumbag piece of shit.
I <3 you, but self respect is more important than you protecting him for whatever reason.
DE_Da_Bartender ⋅ June 23, 2019
You feel that way because he's manipulated you into feeling that way, it's subtle but that's what it sounds like. Just pull the trigger and never look back. From what I've read that he's said to you, it seems like it's just gonna continue escalating and you deserve better than having to continually look over your shoulder about that dark cloud.
Nash ⋅ June 23, 2019
He does not have any right to say those things to you and he certainly doesn't have the right to touch you, hug or otherwise.
DE_fallenandhopeless Nash ⋅ June 24, 2019
I just read one of your past entries about similar harassment situations... perfect timing
DE_jusjusndredre ⋅ June 25, 2019
You should not feel guilty about your boss potentially losing his job. If he cared about his job at all, he wouldn't be jeopardizing it by talking to you in such a derogatory manner. He's using his authority to manipulate you and it's wrong. He needs to be dealt with.
You're doing nothing wrong, he is. 100 percent. You shouldn't have to go through what you're going through and just accept it. Your boss needs a good ass kicking and not one of the kinky ones he'd prefer. 🙄