It’s the reminder, like the 13 alarms I have on my phone… At any moment, if I catch myself smiling too much or having too much fun, the bell sounds to remind myself that I don’t deserve it… That my lot is pain and misery.
It’s being kinder, like the fact that my family is still there.. at any moment, they could be gone and I could’ve spent Saturday visiting instead of being idle. I want the bell to sound when I get too far down that dark hallway that are sometimes my thoughts. My lot is happiness and victory.
Whatever my past says I’ll do, can always be changed with another point of view. I’ll paint the day with a different perspective, with a smile and open mind I can change my world I’ll face my emotions finally, and if they bring me to me knees then so be it. My lot is an ever changing mystery.
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