My mom brought my Aunt Becky over to mom’s house. I was painting chairs happy to be visiting mom to get lectured from Aunt Becky i should clean moms house. I told my Aunt Becky i cant even find time to clean my own damn house because between work. My psychotic friends meltdowns and my mom screaming and crying she going to kill herself i cant get a damn break. There is only so many hours in a day.
My husband stays up almost all night playing videogames. He gets less than 4 hours of sleep to drag me out of bed to help him get ready. He often complains about why doesnt he have clean clothes i need to stay there do his laundry. I try to take care of anyone. Sadly i dont even have time to clean my own house.
While i try to find time to do laundry after he goes to work Amanda rings me over 5o times demanding me moms phone number. I told her no the bitch continuously rang me, cussed my friend Tella out while her son was having emergency surgery. I told Tella block Amanda. She called my sister in law Lesa demanding moms phone number. Lesa realize Amanda was being maniac and told her no. Amanda biggest mistake was cussing Lesa. Lesa offered to beat Amanda’s ass. Amanda didnt get her way. Amanda is furious but with my stress level i cant handle her meltdowns. I blocked her on facebook and my phone to find a moments peace till mom called crying.
I told mom i didnt have the money for gas she rang my phone off the hook till i went over there. Now i dont have gas money to make it till payday but hey she is happy right?
I wanted a day off to clean my house do job applications i wasnt given a moments peace till i blocked Amanda and spent the afternoon at moms. I looked down at my job applications i didnt complete and cried. It has been hard since dad died but everyone wants me to be everything to everyone. I am a failure i dont have money for rent or gas but hey at least mom is happy!
I hope mom gets to go back to work soon. She had a psychological breakdown and was given a week off. During this week she has been driving me crazy. Guilting me dad died i should care for her. I cant even afford to care for myself but here i am burning the candle at both ends trying to make everyone happy.
When dad died i was expected to be on my best behavior and serve mom. I am bitched at if i try to get a moment of peace because mom’s husband died.. Amazing how everyone forgets he is my dad and i am going through hell myself.
My house is messy. I cant afford repairs. I do what i can.forget the rest another day and cry in silence. I am expected to be the strong one. Help Talan get ready every morning. Pay bills on a 10-20 hour paycheck which is damn near possible. I sometimes go to bed hungry promising myself tomorrow will be better. I often lay in bed thinking what if it doesnt get better.. What then?