tiny humans at work in 2019

10:27am

Well, I ended up bringing my neighbour’s little boy to work with me yesterday morning. It was pretty unexpected, and slightly strange, but it worked out ok.

H magically got off of work early [lucky “sales” guys!] and was back in town by like 10:30 so he came straight to pick him up. I thought for sure the little guy was super bored and was going to say he didn’t like hanging out with us. But last night I asked L for all the good gossip and she said he told her he “HAD SO MUCH FUN” with us. She even used the caps lock so I’m going to assume it was an enthusiastic response! That made me feel really good honestly. There’s something about little kids liking you that makes you feel special. It’s kinda like when there’s a dog in the room and out of all the potential laps it chooses yours.

Am I the only one that feels good about these things? haha.

Anyway, it all turned out alright. We got out late [almost 8pm] on Thursday and just before I left the neighbour’s said they still had my leftovers if I wanted them. Heck yeah I do! So I went over after we got home and they had a huge piece of pork loin, asparagus, and rice in our container. Plus some broccoli/chicken rice thing she’d just made so I got a plate of that too. It was all so delicious! H is really excellent at making pork! I don’t know how he does it. Normally I don’t eat much of it but I’ve tried his a couple times and it’s amazing!

Later that night I got a text asking when I worked the next day. Turns out they couldn’t find anyone to watch Dev and they both had to be at work early. I hesitated knowing the next morning was one of the only mornings we had back-to-back appointments. I asked if he’d be ok sitting around quietly, but she didn’t think so. She told me they were going to take him to a friend’s but then a little later she asked me again. I told her we’d figure it out and the next morning they dropped him off by 7:15. Honestly, I wasn’t even out of bed yet. hah. So mom watched him until I got up and then I took over. They probably should have given us instructions on the car seat. I told H later and he totally laughed at me but we seriously don’t have any kids around. There haven’t been kids in years and when we were little we barely had to wear seat belts. haha.

It was fine though. When H came to pick him up he told me he was going to go home to BBQ for us but a little later I remembered it was Friday and we don’t eat meat. haha. I double checked with him when we got home [late again] to make sure he didn’t actually cook and we agreed to do something today when “you can actually eat!” haha. Plans aren’t finalized so I’ll wait to hear from them. I don’t get out until at least 6pm anyway.

I’m so ready for this day to be over. I have a client that should have been here 10 minutes ago but he hasn’t shown up. Either he forgot or he’s just late. I’d really like to get him out since he’s been sitting in my box for a while but we’ll see. His took me a lot of work too. Mental work learning new things, but still work. On the bright side [other than knowing how to do something I didn’t know before!] if the Sheriff actually shows up this year, he’d have the same paperwork and I’ll look like an expert in his eyes. ha. It’s so close to the deadline though that I don’t think he’s going to show up at all. He would have called by now. Kind of a bummer but it’s alright. I’m surprised he worked with me last year, and the year before! I never expected him to come back at all. It was fun while it lasted. =)

In other news: I don’t know what I’m feeling about this new guy but I’m definitely starting to feel something. And I think it’s silly and stupid. I’m not ready to feel any sorta way about anyone new! It freaks me out. Especially because it’s him and I don’t understand why it would be him.

Is that weird? That I can’t even figure out my own feelings or why I’m feeling them?! It feels weird… =\

In the end it might not ever turn into anything. I don’t know what he feels. It’s been so up and down/mixed messages. I can’t imagine what he’s been feeling either. I know that I’m not always all open and wearing my heart on my sleeve.

Last night when I got home I sent a text saying I needed a beer. He said he’d join me tomorrow [aka today]. I made jokes about thinking he meant last night and how I was watching LivePD so I was going to say no. But then I said maybe he could watch it with me, he might like it and that would be one less reason to get divorced. A bit later we heard crazy loud music/truck and mom was joking it was him but I said it couldn’t be because he works today. Well I peeked out the window [I am still that old lady watching from behind her curtains haha] and I saw a truck leaving that looked just like his work truck. I don’t know why it bothers me when I find out he’s been next door and hasn’t said a word to me. For some reason I think that if he liked me he’d say something. But what do I know?

He texted me back shortly after that and said maybe he would one day if I invited him. I told him that I thought that was an invite and he said it was half assed. I joked about all the exclamation points I put and that maybe I was waiting for him to invite me.

I tried to go to sleep early but it was still like 10:45 by the time I got to my bed. haha. I was scrolling through my phone, turning on my music and looking back at texts, when out of nowhere my screen jumped up and I got a text from him. It was so late that it was totally unexpected. I honestly didn’t think he’d respond to that last line at all. And it was a stupid kissy heart emoji. He’s seriously the only person I have ever texted that has sent me that emoji. Crazy right?! haha. I thought “ok whatever”, then another text popped up “maybe some other time”, ok, and another “how about tomorrow?”
Dude. That so does not count as an invite! You can’t invite me over to my neighbour’s house to hang with everyone. That’s not what I meant at all. Plus I’m already invited! haha. I told him I would think about it ;) and that he should be sleeping so he put some dumb emoji and said good night.

I haven’t heard from any of them today so who knows if we’re actually going to hang out and eat. I could really use a drink. But I’m definitely NOT drinking like I have been. I get all cool and comfortable being that I’m right next door and I stop keeping track of how many drinks I’ve had. I have always kept track since the day I started drinking, but I’m letting myself get lazy and that’s why I’m hanging my head over the toilet at the end of the night. haha. I better get my sh*t together.

Oh haha I just got a text from L: “Can Rose come out and play yet?! Lol” I assume that’s from Dev because of the quotes and not actually L asking. [update: I was wrong. It was L. haha!]
Also, my client finally showed up at like 2:30pm, so I got that done!

If all goes well I’ll get out of here by 5, go to church, and go home to hang with the neighbours. I hope they’re not going to be super drunk by the time I get there. I don’t know what time they’ll start [or if they started already!] but I told her to make sure they all take naps before I get home. I’m hoping for a nice easy going evening. I have to work tomorrow either way but it’ll be cool to kick back and relax for a bit.

There’s way more I want to say about this other dude but I don’t have the time right now. I started to get into it and then it’s been busy enough to distract me so my thoughts are jumbled now.

I just need to take the time to sit with my feelings and figure out what the heck is going on in my head. I know it’s different than anyone else before. In so many ways. Like I think I’m interested but I’m not panicking about it. It doesn’t make me nervous....and I guess that makes me nervous? hah.

I’ll probably screw it up and it won’t even matter. That I am pretty good at!

rose.
4:28pm