always in a flash* in 2019

1:04pm

I am currently waiting for a client that may or may not show up. I don’t want to start a new project yet so I’m killin’ some time. I’ll give him like 10 more minutes before I jump onto something else.

I thought I should give some updates that maybe didn’t involve the neighbours or their friends. =]

On Sunday I took my second shot. I screwed it up, but in a different way, so maybe next Sunday I’ll have mom do it for me. There were definite improvements but it still went slightly wrong. I ended up getting more medication into my leg than last time. I wasn’t nearly as nervous about it and sorta knew what to expect. Also, I got more liquid into the syringe and remembered to let go of my thigh before I injected it. hah. But I’m pretty positive that I hit a vein on the way in and might have done it too close to the surface of the skin. The injection site was hurting for a while afterwards and my skin next to it had turned yellow [the color of the meds] so yeah.

Otherwise it’s totally fine and there were no lingering effects the next morning. I did get tired again that night, but it didn’t knock me back nearly as bad as the first round. Nothing else to note, which is really good. I’m supposed to go in for labs next week sometime and then I have another appointment at the end of the month to check in. I might have to call before that to ask about prescriptions. My insurance didn’t cover the shots [Thank God they weren’t that expensive!] and she never submitted a scrip for the steroids she wanted me to stay on. We’ll see though. I might be able to wait until I go in. I’m curious what labs she submitted and what results will turn up.

I think I’m making improvements in other areas of my life as well because I finished that entry last night and saw an old entry from 2017 pop up. I know exactly what it is and that it has to do with a memory between TF and I that always made me smile. I didn’t read it though. I completely resisted the urge to click and reminisce over that moment. I mean, most of it can automatically play out in my head in scenes but I didn’t reread those words. Not last night and not this morning either when I proofread last night’s stuff. So I’ll call that definite progress!

I’m feeling good about it. Like there really is no reason to look back on that now. It was from two years ago; so much happened back then and since then. I clearly don’t need to torture myself with it.

Anyway, I am going to mention the neighbour’s friend real quick. I can’t help myself! haha. It’s just been so easy going that I’d kinda like to have a reminder of it. How it all went down. What the beginning was like. I don’t know. Something to look back on some day to remember how nice it all was.

It’s not just him either. It’s all of them. I seriously haven’t fit so seamlessly into a group since I moved in with Sam in college.

[damn, so I’m still at work and we just got a call from the place my uncle lives in Oregon. I knew it had to be something terrible when they called our office. Sure enough they said it was urgent for mom to call back so I interrupted her and apparently they’re performing CPR on their way to the hospital. I really hope he’s going to be ok. There’s just no way we can go all the way up to OR right now and we certainly can’t do anything from here. ugh. This sucks.]

I don’t even know what I was going to ramble on about now. I guess sometimes life hits you in the face and then you forget all the trivial stuff that runs through your mind.

rose.

Update: Well, unfortunately, he passed away. There was nothing they could do. I think it was probably like 20 minutes after they called that they pronounced him dead. It’s crazy. Completely unexpected. He was doing totally fine. Having beat a really mild cancer multiple times already. We have no idea what happened to him. No details other than they found him unresponsive.
He doesn’t have any family [at least none he kept in touch with] besides us. All mom knows is that he wanted to be cremated. We don’t really have details on that either. Supposedly the center will box up his stuff and ship it to us if we can’t go out there. I was going to try to clear mom’s schedule for this weekend if she needs to make an emergency trip but it doesn’t look like she’ll need to at this point. They are going to call her Tuesday morning to I guess go over the details. We’ll see how it goes. I mean, there isn’t anything we can do now. Collect what few possessions he had and wrap up his life. I feel so bad that there is no one to notify. I told my brother, uncle, and aunt, but other than that there’s no one. No actual relatives. We were the closest thing he had and he was married to my dad’s sister [but long since divorced] and was my dad’s best friend. So even we aren’t blood, or really marriage, relatives either. It makes me so sad.

I should have known something was wrong. He called me last Monday early in the morning to tease me about the snow. He never calls me. To the point where I was actually worried because I missed the call while I was in the shower. I had mom call back and everything was just fine. I ended up calling him later that morning from work and I am so glad I did. I would so regret if I hadn’t answered his call. We joked about the snow and talked all about visiting in May as soon as work slowed down. He even told me that our usual birthday dinner restaurant had closed down and mentioned having to find a new one. I guess none of that matters now. There’s really no reason to ever go back to Oregon now… =|

Last updated March 06, 2019