Feb. 25 - Backpfeifengesicht in Posso's Prompts

Backpfeifengesicht (n:) a slappable face, a face “in need of a slap”.

There are a few times where I have been slapped that have definitely stuck with me.

High school. I was dating a girl from a nearby city and she had gotten word that I had told a bunch of my friends about something she was very self-conscious of; she had two very different sized breasts. Her one very large C cup breast and accompanied by one very little A. When I had first found out, I was fondling her underneath a blanket on a summer camp trip. I was puzzled when I had switch from one mountain to a molehill that was topped with kleenex - she stuffed so it looked like she filled out a bra. The real reason that I got slapped was for the nickname the friends and I had dubbed onto her. We had been working on Into Thin Air and talking about sherpas and mountain climbing and there is a famous sherpa that died summiting Everest. His name was Lopsang Jangbu. Yes, we called my girlfriend Lopsang Jangbu. Yes. I know. Dick move.

Back when I had my first Verizon contract and decided I needed a flip phone and was already $400 in debt from ringback tones, I was up in the holy land of Fond du Lac, Wisconsin, getting shitty and making dumb decisions in the middle of a corn field with friends when I decided I was going to come unglued and I was going to walk 20 miles to a friend’s location and try to drink with him because I was tired of being at this party and wanted to run away in true Posso fashion. After being hip tossed, thrown down, screamed at, my friend Matt sat on top of me, kneeled on my arms and began to slap the shit out of me repeatedly as I screamed, cried, spat and hissed. I don’t remember the beginning of this one but I think it is one of a half dozen times where a friend successfully brought me back from a black out drunk stupor.

Another one that I only remember because it was the sobering point was a time where I was out causing problems with my friend Brad. We were at the downtown Vintage bar; I was too loaded on heavy poured Jameson cocktails and was wandering up and down the bar, looking at girls that I had no chance with. Apparently, wasted me decided that the girl with the nicest ass at the bar, who also visibly was holding her boyfriends hand, would be the perfect target for a handsy grabby montage by yours truly. I remember the slap from her and laughing about it, I don’t remember the forearm/elbow combo my face took from her boyfriend, nor how we had to use my white North Face jacket to soak the blood up while I kept laughing. I woke up the next morning in my bed with what I thought was my jacket, but I wasn’t sure how it became crimson colored instead of white.

I’ve deserved a lot of the slaps I’ve taken over the years. The action itself seems designed to create a lasting memory and for me, its had the same effect for memory recall as hearing a song on the radio.