Happy... in 2019

I am really happy lately. I’m still tired and I still have my days, but I’m happy for the first time in quite a while.

The weekend wasn’t perfect. I was on my period. It rained most of the time. My animals made lots of messes. James’s truck wouldn’t start. We got stuck in traffic for over an hour… just some of the stuff that happened, but it was still an absolutely amazing weekend.

On Friday I spent a while cleaning and then I showered, straightened my hair, put on some makeup and headed to James’s. He said multiple times just how pretty I was. Of course he backtracked and said I was always pretty but just with makeup I was really pretty. I didn’t take it offensively lol. I know he has a thing for eyeliner and straight hair. We stayed the night at his place on Friday. Put on the Dark Crystal and crashed.

On Saturday morning we came back to my house so I could take care of animals. We bleached his hair and played video games etc. Eventually we got ready to go out to dinner with my sister and other friends for her birthday. It was a bit overwhelming for him bc a lot of people he didn’t know who had already been drinking bc we got caught in traffic for an hour and were late. We got home, put in Willow and went to bed.

The next morning we finished Willow and just hung out. We stayed at my house til about 7 and then went to his place. He h.g ad to be at work at 11. We napped for a while. We both left around 10:40… about 10 minutes later he called me bc he had stopped at the gas station for an energy drink and when he came out his truck wouldn’t start. We couldn’t get it jumped, so we left it there and went back to his place and crashed. The next morning I called out of work and we headed back to my house to pick up my halo and stuff. Managed to get it jumped from the halo and took it to auto zone and got a new battery. I knew he was seriously stressing over the truck. But after we got it dealt with and taken home and got food and sat down at his place to eat… he kinda just got emotional about it. He’s really not used to anyone helping him… he’s used to always having to help others and being the only person he can depend on. So he was just really appreciative that I had stuck around and helped and kept him calm and gotten it dealt with so smoothly. And he started crying for a few minutes and then kept saying it was stupid and I’m like no I get it… you were worried all night about how this would turn out, you’re worried about money, work, etc. I told you I’d be here and we would figure it out. But I just hugged him and let him get it out. Of course then he was worried about not seeming manly or something and I’m like I think it takes a lot more strength to show your emotions sometimes especially for guys. So we had a really good weekend.

Oh yeah… and I’m not sure how it came up, but on Friday he started talking to me about what we’ll do on holidays as far as working out seeing both our families. That’s a bit far off, but it definitely makes me feel like he’s serious about us. Tonight we were talking about Valentine’s and he asked if I was coming over and I’m like of course but I don’t want stuff, I just want you. He kept saying he felt like he needed to do something and he needs to do more. I told him he does plenty for me. He said at one point that I could do so much better but I just don’t think so.

Tomorrow I have a hair appointment so hopefully that turns out well.

Last updated July 10, 2020