What I sent in New Beginnings

  • Jan. 28, 2019, 8:33 p.m.
  • |
  • Public

Maybe it was a mistake. Maybe I’ve just poked the bear again, but I can’t be called a spineless, immoral coward and not say anything.

“Erika.

I’m sorry I hurt you. I know the following rings hollow, but it was never my intent. You deleted our photos before you sent your initial email. That told me a lot. Specifically, you had already bailed on this relationship. How can I ghost on someone who had already left? I hadn’t saved my own copies because I thought they’d always be there. I wasn’t expecting to break up.

There’s more I wish I could say if only to give you closure since I can no longer give you comfort. However, anything I might say would likely be perceived as responding in anger or without sincerity, so I cannot respond in depth. Since we can no longer communicate without hurting each other, this is my final correspondence to you. Good bye.”


Marg January 29, 2019

That's very impressive considering what you wanted to say - it was very graceful and eloquent and got across the most significant aspect of the whole thing. If she's any sense she'll accept that and leave you alone now.

I'm sorry this has happened though - it must hurt.

Robbo Marg ⋅ January 29, 2019

I'm not so naive as expect that I won't get some sort of blow back, but I've resolved not to respond to whatever comes.

Marg Robbo ⋅ January 29, 2019

I think that's very wise.

Star Maiden January 29, 2019

That's less fun, but I get it.

Robbo Star Maiden ⋅ January 29, 2019

After I had cooled, someone with less emotional investment explained that I have an advantage in that her previous email was so insulting and disdainful, and I may lose the support of any impartial 3rd parties if I lost my composure and responded in kind.

.essie. January 29, 2019

This I like much better. Anger feels good in the moment, but once emotions cool, hurting someone on purpose never feels like a good choice. Now you get to be the better person. I know that when you meet the right person, they won't treat you with childish cruelty. And you'll appreciate them for it. Hugs.

Small Town Girl February 01, 2019

Good response. Even though we always want to say what we feel in anger, this e-mail will say more to her than if you had went more in depth. In all actuality, that response will probably drive her crazy. Which while not your intent, is better than sending emails back and forth that will only further the pain on both sides.

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