An update in Who I Am

Things are starting to make a little more sense. I think the best thing for me to do is to cut ties with my past and with Matt. I think that our time has passed and I need to move on with Kenny. Kenny is absolutely wonderful to me and even if we end up not together, I really just don’t think Matt and I are really meant to be. I think my brain needed the closure.

Now that I’ve come to that realization I’ve been able to be less anxious.

I got transferred to a different department at work which is great it’s more on my career path. I’m kind of nervous but honestly it’s for the best. I’m in training with some of my old class which I have mixed feelings about. Mostly positive.

We had a dinner party this weekend which was pretty fun, except half the people who said they were going to show up didn’t. which was instant karma for me because I go the date wrong on one of my friends WEDDINGS. yeah. I thought it was like Black Friday for some reason but instead it was this past Saturday. I don’t know why I was so far off but I’ve been like that lately.

I feel like I’m just out of sync with life.

I got a bad flat the other day. The tire is shredded and I’m currently riding a donut. I owe 4 grand on this rusty 04. ughhh. I have so much debt.

My paycheck came and went. Just like that.

What else is new right.

I’ve gained 20lbs since March. Fucking. Sad.