So close in Socially Awkward

I weighed in at 130 this morning. That is sooo close to the 120s. You would not believe how happy I would be to get in the 120s again. Its been 7 years since I've been in the 120s. I can do it, I can do it. I was honestly surprised to see 130 this morning. I'm back to weighing myself daily which, of course, is not healthy.

I'm going back through my old OD entries from the beginning. Some of them are EXTREMELY difficult to read. So far I've made it through the first five months (Feb '06-June '06) and I've already read about the first time I fasted 24 hrs, cut, and threatened suicide. These entries are intense. I find myself sitting here rooting my 17-18 year old self on saying "you can do it, you can do it, just graduate high school and in about 6 months, life will be better." But I didn't know that when i wrote these entries. If anyone I knew in real life ever read these, i don't know what I'd do. So, I can't lose my thumbdrive because that's where they are.

It's a pretty uneventful weekend here, which is fine. Kinda chilly, but I would LOVE it if it snowed. Snow makes everything better.