Stereotypes About Girls in Book Five: Working Through the Maze 2018
- July 25, 2018, 6:22 a.m.
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- Public
I just saw a few videos.
Mothers who feel tired and are hard on themselves because they don’t believe they’ve done enough to feel tired.
Girls who beat themselves up because they were raised to be perfectionists.
Little Girls who are risk averse because “girls aren’t raised to take risks and boys are.”
And you know what I found?
If we play the game of Gender Politics without going deeper into anything? By society’s standards: I am a woman. Seriously. Listening to all of this “political word edited” stuff saying “Women have emotions, Men have actions.” Or “Women shouldn’t feel bad about being tired.” Or “Girls are raised to be perfectionists.” Or “Women want babies, men just want sex.” Or “Little Girls are risk averse, boys love taking risks.” Or “Girls talk and create emotional bonds; boys play sports and create memories.”
Like.... stop it. Seriously. Stop it. Stop trying to Gender everything. Stop it.
How about we say, “Humans have emotions. As a species of emotions, we should encourage one another to express those emotions in healthy ways and teach each other not to negatively judge someone simply because they are experiencing an emotion.”
How about we say, “Adult Humans shouldn’t feel bad if they are tired. Bodies, brains, and our surroundings all play significant roles in how tired we may feel. If you feel tired, don’t treat it as a defeat but as your body saying something to you.”
How about we say, “Many people in our world are raised to be perfectionists. How troubling is that? There are people today working themselves sick trying to reach a standard that they will never achieve?”
How about we say, “People approach aging and sexuality in a number of different ways. Some people hit 40 and think ‘BABY!’ whereas some people hit 40 and think ‘Sex for pleasure! The thing is… neither is right or wrong. What you want is what you want, there isn’t anything wrong with it. But if you feel like you are being pressured into something you don’t want? THAT needs to be addressed and resolved.”
How about we say, “Some kids are raised being encouraged to take risks, climb rocks, make mistakes. Other kids are raised to not be dirty, stay in place, don’t make noise. The trick is we need to teach both types of kids the value of risk and risk aversion. We don’t want people growing up thinking they need to take every risk that is launched at them. So to, we don’t want people growing up thinking that they never need to take a risk.”
How about we say, “We need to encourage students of all ages and genders to learn how to communicate, create bonds, and become active in their lives. When students create good memories with good friends, they have a brighter future.”
In other words.... I get it that there are issues that our society has created that women have traditionally gotten the raw deal on. But if we’re talking about making our world a healthier place… framing your Ted Talk to be “Girls are X, Boys are Y” seems outdated, gendered, and fucked up.
Might as well say “Girls like Archie Comics, Boys like Batman.”
Deleted user ⋅ July 25, 2018
Stereotypes are generalized observations. People seem to like stereotypes when they serve them and dislike them when they're derogatory toward something they approve of. That doesn't necessarily mean that the general trends aren't real and useful for making wide observations. Walmart made a worldwide empire out of generalizing people's likes and dislikes.
Perpetually Plump ⋅ July 25, 2018
Stereotypes exist for a reason. They hold true more often than not. And we do raise males and females differently. But then you get someone like me who is a female but doesn't understand what that means. I don't care about what's normal for females. I don't care what society thinks I can and can't do. I do me. And if that means i do male shit then okay. If that means I do girl shit then okay. I don't care. I don't need to be marginalized or pigeonholed or categorized to do what I do. I just kickass and take names.
woman in the moon ⋅ July 25, 2018
Boys and girls want the same things, except girls want them in pretty colors =-= Ed on Northern Exposure.
Catleesi ⋅ July 25, 2018
Gender is a social construct, why is it that there are certain stereotypes here that hold true with men and women in North America but if you look at different cultures you have a different set of stereotypes?
It's how we raise our children and enforce these norms. It's damaging to tell little boys that they can't cry, just as it's damaging say 'boys will be boys' and give girls all the responsibility. Using the excuse that it's because that's the norm is BS without looking at the reasons why it's the norm. (Just replying to the comments above and agreeing with your stance.)