shaky in breathe

my day’s been stressful. idk if its the new meds i’m on or just me being stupid but i’ve nearly cried over the stupidest things. i didnt have a bus ticket and i almost had a mental breakdown. my aunt tried to talk and just fucking make conversation and i felt like dying. i let the dogs out cause they were barking really loudly and i get yelled at cause they could come back smelling like a skunk. i broke after that. tears snot spit, the whole gross crying shebang. this is why i hate crying. it makes me feel weak and gross. idk if it was anxiety or what but i kept thinking that i deserved to feel so terrible that i could barely breathe and rocking back and forth didnt help like it usually does. i couldnt chill until i somehow managed to play some calm youtube vids
i think the meds are amplifying every bad feeling but i’ll stay on them cause even if that is the case i deserve that mental strain