With kids in Stuff

I feel like my time for writing here has been less and less recently, and I’ve gone from writing probably every other day to writing about once per week. It’s really busy with work right now. Whenever we are non-stop at the office we joke that it’s “litigation season” but I really don’t think there’s a season. I think we just want to be able to say something like this is our busy time of year like so many people in other professions.

As spring feels like it’s finally coming to the area, it’s been nice to open some windows and spend a little more time outside. Every year at this time I have the same thought: I didn’t realize how much I missed being outside until it finally warmed up and I could be out there again. It’s almost like our little neighborhood wakes up from hibernation and suddenly I see activity in people’s yards. Then that will all change once the leaves grow back and we all get our vegetation privacy again.

Megan has told me that her contractor is beginning to schedule work to install her hot tub, and she’s excited about that. It’s more than just a hot tub really, she’s having her whole yard redesigned and re-landscaped with this in-ground tub and deck and patio and walkway. I wouldn’t be surprised if she’s spending $100k on the whole thing, and that just makes me wonder how much money she has. She’s told me that she lives mostly off savings and that her income from the gym and massages doesn’t really amount to enough to support her. But I’m curious what that really means. How much does she spend and how much of it comes from savings? How much does she have in savings? Does she feel like it’s enough that she doesn’t need to worry?

None of this is any of my business, but I can’t help but feel a little nosy.

I know some parents prefer the school year because it keeps their kids occupied, but I confess I’m looking forward to summer so we can do more things as a family. I’m a firm believer in not taking them out of school so we can go on a trip, and likewise I don’t like to travel on the weeks when they’re on breaks because that’s when everyone else travels. So we’re left with cramming a year’s worth of vacations into about 10 weeks in the summer. This isn’t a complaint, I’m used to it. It’s just the way life is these days. And when they get older we’ll probably be less likely to take trips together, so I’ll just enjoy this time while I have it.

We’re focusing on three somewhat local trips this year. All of them are beach-centered, which is our usual. We’ll spend a week on the outer banks, a week on the Jersey shore, and a week out on Fire Island. I know I should be the mature adult and act very casual about these trips, but on the inside I’m looking forward to them just as much as the kids are. I need to get away.

Mercer has been going by Mercy lately, a name I kind of like because I had a good friend growing up with that name. Oddly, one of the things I most remember about Mercy was the fact that she developed physically at a young age. When my group of girlfriend was age 10 or 11 and we were all small and shapeless, there was Mercy with her hips and breasts and we were all a bit in awe of what had happened to her.

Part of me wants to write page after page of everything going on with “Mercy” these days, but I’m not so sure I’m ready to really put my feelings into words. At the same time, I recognize that doing so would probably be a good thing.

I sometimes look to the way that Olsen and Harrison relate to Mercy and feel like I need to learn from them. They are both so extremely open and accepting to the idea of having a sister now, and that the older Mercer is a thing of the past. I hear them giddily sharing hair and makeup secrets, like this is a fun new adventure for them.

And in completely unrelated news, I’ve been feeling more acutely lately a lack of any romantic life. In some ways I feel like I ended my last relationship prematurely. But the fact that it never quite felt like a relationship is exactly why I ended it. It was a odd middle-ground between fuckbuddy and something real. I’m OK with either, I just want to know that it’s one or the other, not something nebulous.

Other than dating sites, I don’t know how I’ll meet someone. But I hate being a 50 year old woman with three kids on a dating site.

Last updated May 01, 2018