Solid Ground in Musings

After a year of being lost in a maze of reverie and what-ifs, I feel like I’m finding my footing again. It feels good to have both feet firmly planted in the real world. I’m a classic INFP personality type, and I tend towards the idealization of life. I get caught up in romanticizing situations and scenarios, and on the flip side of that, get easily frustrated and disappointed when the real world imposes its coldness and indifference upon me. I see things as they should be , rather than as they are. That naive and unrealistic worldview has bitten me in the ass time and again over the course of my life. My depression is largely a direct result of the bitter disappointment I feel in people, in myself, in LIFE.
This past year I found myself once again caught up in chasing fairytales- some semblance of a happily ever after that my inner self INSISTS has to be out there for me eventually. That was foolish- “Fool’s Gold”, as I once wrote about a long time ago. Life has a way of coming full circle though- we face the same challenges over and over until we get it right and learn enough about ourselves to move on.
Reality is messy. It’s contradictory and compromising and a million shades of gray. But sooner or later, even the most idealistic of us has to reach the conclusion that either you come down from the clouds or you get lost in them forever. I’ve landed......

Last updated April 11, 2018