Fate cont'd 10/22/2003
We left for the mixer after I had done yet another shot of vodka. I called Chris, half-drunkenly, telling him I should be at the Rat around midnight...I felt worse after I called because now I really felt like a fuck buddy. The mixer was basically devoid of all boys, with the exception of maybe four, so I helped myself to three cups of punch. We ended up playing this dice game with the frat boys once the party had gotten started. Every number stood for something..Like, if you rolled a one you had to chug a beer, a two was to chug punch, a three was to do a keg stand, four was to give a brother a lap dance, etc...The boys liked telling us we rolled fours even when we didn't...That and sixes, which meant we had to kiss a brother for five seconds. Erin at one point was standing on top of a table kissing a frat brother when I decided to play. I ended up having to give some guy a lap dance. I was pretty drunk so the lap dance was really bad apparently. I couldn't face the guy and do it because I felt too guilty and the brothers yelled at me. I got depressed and drank more punch.
I honestly don't remember chunks of the night after that. Big disappeared for awhile and then reappeared after running away from a frat brother who took her up to his room...He tried to lock the door, she flipped out, and literally ran away...She was also really wasted and we decided to go to the Rathskellar, a club where I met, and usually run into, Chris. Big and I got separated and I ended up dancing and making out with some random guy. I don't remember how I met up with Big again, but we decided to leave.
I'm not sure how I met up with Chris. I think he called my cell and I told him I was outside...I'm not sure, but he came out with one of his friends who was also really drunk. I was busy trying to take care of Big who was also thoroughly wasted. I gave $2 to some chick named Jasmine who randomly came up to us and begged for money because she was stranded...kind of dumb of me to say the least.
Chris came back with his drunken friend and we started talking. I acted like an idiot and blurted out, "Chris what the hell are we?" I then proceeded to tell him that I didn't care if he just thought of him as a friend (which I said repeatedly) but I wanted to know what we were. I'm such an ass sometimes, and even more so when I'm drunk. I sounded like I was in third grade. He told me he liked me more than as just a friend. We somehow got into the conversation that he would come back to my apartment with me. Then I kept telling him (repeatedly) "You don't have to come back with me, I don't care...go take care of your friend instead." He kept saying, "No no I want to go back with you, why would you think that I wouldn't?"
We ended up going to a pizzeria with our drunken friends to try and sober Big and his suitemate up...didn't work. He out his friend on the bus back to campus and the remaining three of us walked back to the apartment. Big totally speed-walked ahead of us which left me alone with Chris. I don't remember what I told him, but we talked the entire time.
As for the rest of the night....I'm putting it into a private entry. All I can say is that I'm never drinking that much again...luckily fate stepped in and prevented me from making a massive mistake...
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