Idiot thing in Mental Health, 2017

You guys. I did an idiot thing. In my defense I didn’t think the result was going to be as bad as it was. Though, it could have been a lot worse.

Yesterday, I was feeling pretty meh all day, but then kickboxing helped my mood, and I did two back to back classes. even more endorphins! and then those steadily wore off and my mood feel into the beginning stages of a depressive funk.

Then, because I wasn’t thinking properly, I had this bright idea: “I wonder what would happen if I low-key overdosed on the Zoloft.” Everything on the internet suggests you would have to take about 1,000mg of sertraline before you felt anything. some people on interwebs took 1700-1800mg. They highest prescribed dose my doctor ever put me on was 200mg, which lasted about a week before it was too much for me. i was on 50mg for about a year, 100mg for 1-2 months, and then 200mg for that week.

I haven’t been on it in months now, and thought I’d be fine at 400mg. I just wanted to know if that would do anything. That was my mindset.

I woke up twice in the middle of the night (5am- ish, which seems like middle of the night) puking my guts out. the first time it was like a test for the second puking session which DID NOT WANT TO STOP. Shortly after that, diarrhea. Serotonin syndrome.

Now I gotta spend the day rehydrating myself and crossing my fingers that it stays down. And I wont be able to go to kickboxing tonight. I didn’t think this through, obviously. But I hardly EVER puke, and I thought if anything, I’d feel a racing heart, slight fever, and lightheadedness. Well good job, body. My body’s physical survival skills are on point.