We have 3 tree ornaments in honour of Olivia. Surprisingly enough one came from my in laws. The holidays are so hard now.. I still love Christmas + mine and Chris' birthdays are in December too, but last year was just heart breaking. All those visions of celebrating Christmas with a little squish just.. gone. I also used to love Thanksgiving, but that weekend is the last weekend I saw our daughter... kinda has a big dark cloud lurking over head like you said. Life is just so weird now. Totally separated into "before Olivia" and "after Olivia".