Define Irony... 6/9/2001
I went to my awards ceremony last night. It was,well, a joke. My school is very sports-oriented and it definitely showed last night. All of these sports people who have done next to nothing for the past four years (in some cases, seventeen or eighteen) and were given such superfluous comments I was physically ill. This one guy, Danny Laidlow decided earlier in the year to knock down an entire bottle of peppermint Schnapps. He passed out in an alcoholic coma during his first period calculus class and the ambulance had to come and pick him up. Last night, Danny was called "a leader and active participant in his community, as well as a sports star who was respected by his coaches." Joe Bimona, a star football player with a double-digit IQ got a full ride to University of Maryland--Baltimore County. I don't even think he knows what classes he took this year.
Kids were getting hundreds on dollars in scholarships and were being praised as "academic leaders." Before each scholarship was given out, the faculty would announce the overall GPA and which school the person was headed to in the fall. One of the boys who was praised as an academic leader had a 3.0 average and planned to get an associate's degree in liberal arts at Suffolk Community Colege in the fall. Now, I'm not bashing community colleges or 3.0 GPA's, but I wouldn't call these types of people academic leaders either. I would say that at least half of these academic leaders were going to Suffolk Community College.
My school also padded GPA's. I know that Kim Johnson, who got rejected from SUNY--Oneonta, as well as two other relatively non-selective schools has no more than a 75 average. I know this because her best friend, my good buddy Sara, told me. Sara said that she was totally shocked when they announced Kim's average to be an 85. I also know Kim pretty well, and she just isn't a B student. Mike Schernott, yet another football star, was announced to have a "solid B average." Unfortunately, they failed to mention he was taking four b.s classes this semester.
Another girl, Nikole Klemana, was announced as "a girl whose sparkling personality brings sunshine to everyone she meets. She is loved and respected by her classmates." Oh really? Which classmates are these? At Homecoming earlier this year, Nikole and this kid named Josh were runners up for Homecoming King and Queen. Josh is a nice guys, pretty good-looking, kind of a slacker, but generally a good person. Nikole refused to dance with him at Homecoming (the runners-up and the King and Queen are all required to dance with each other for one dance) because she thought he was beneath her. Anyone who doesn't run with her crowd isn't worth talking to, in her opinion. She's fairly smart, but talks and acts like a valley girl (bimbo).
The academic awards were hurried through. No GPA's or future college plans were announced for the people who won academic awards. I was pretty happy though; out of my grade I'm going to one of the more competitive schools. I was beat out of the award for Highest Average in AP Biology. I had a 96 average, but JG (our class valedictorian) had a 100. I was beat out of the award for Highest Average in Economics. I had a 99, but Tom Haney had a 100. I got Highest Average in AP European History. After I had received my award, I walked out early with my family. I'm tired of high school and my school's blatant obsession with athletics was making me upset. I fouond out today that after I left, I was called up for another award--The President's Academic Award for Outstanding Academic Achievement. These awards are oraganized into bronze, silver, and gold. I got the gold one :o)
I was talking to Joe F. in Economics today and he agreed that the awards were b.s. See, I'm not crazy....
Certain people really deserved their awards. Angyl got three awards in music, including an award given by the music department basically stating that she was the best in the grade. Blossom got a scholarship. Sonia got an award for her outstanding contribution to the literary magazine.
Fred pissed me off last night though. He had won two or three scholarships, plus a few awards, which was awesome. However, when his name was being announced he had instructed his teachers beforehand to announce him as, "The greatest man in the world, according to him." Arrogant much? The firt time it happened, it was almost funny, but by the third, even Jake was rolling his eyes.
Ah well...three more days, possibly two, and I'm finished with those people forever.
Until Later
Artist
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