Is It True...? 5/16/2001
Yesterday, or maybe it was the day before, my entire AP European History class was just kind of hanging out. We already took the AP exam, and there's not much else to do. Anyway, my teacher, Mrs. W, was telling everyone that high school is supposed to be the best time of our lives. (God, I hope not...) Our class clown, Phil, says "Please! Everyday I go home and resist the urge to commit suicide!" He was joking, of course, but the fact that he's a fairly religious Catholic just made the comment funnier. So Mrs. W asks me, "Well, Artist, you're older, you have experience on this topic. Was high school the best time of your life?" I didn't want to be a downer and say, "Hell's no, it sucked," even though I was really, really tempted to. So I kind of just shrugged off the question and said that it was ok.
But I started thinking...Is high school supposed to be the best time of your life? That would be pretty depressing if that turned out to be true. Everyone else seems to enjoy high school. I don't know, I'm weird. It seems that when most people go through high school, they have a couple of boyfriends/girlfriends, hang out on Friday and Saturday nights, go to prom, have a blast, go to graduation and cry, things like that. I hang out with my friends a few times a month, but more often than not, I end up staying home because my friends were working, we couldn't get rides, or just no-one wanted to go out. I refuse to go to graduation or prom (which will be explained in a later entry) and I honestly can't say that high school was a memorable experience. Well, it was an experience...it's just "memorable" isn't the adjective I would use. I've always had at least one person teasing me about something, up until this year. I've definitely worked harder than most, but that's because I absolutely hate failing or doing poorly, when I know I can do ten times better.
My most favorite book of all time, which I can't seem to find, is called, "Flight 114 is Down," by Caroline B. Cooney. Normally I read more sophisticated books, but there was something about this book that kind of just sucked me in. I couoldn't really relate to the plot itself, but one of the main characters sounded almost exactly like me. (Except she ended up with a good-looking older guy at the end, but that's beside my point). She'd always felt different from everyone else, and was kind of alienated from most people because she was quiet. She comapred herself to an alien saying, "That she was a foreign life form who would one day go home." I feel like that most of the time. My friends are generally ok people, but I've never really fit in with them. (Read my On the Outside Lookin In entry..it basically summarizes this one). God, I hope college is nothing like high school!!! I'm getting so frustrated. I'm beginning to be glad that I'm going away...
Until next time
Artist
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