Misc. 3/10/2001
Well, I got into Syracuse University today. I kind of expected that I would because my stats were definitely in the school's range. Their science department is only so-so, so I'm not sure if I really want to go there. Besides, I've heard from several people (and I'm not saying this is this truth, this is just what I heard) that Syracuse overall is an EXTREMELY snobby school. I don't know, I'll visit sometime in April and check everything out.
Rebecca's sitting right next to me so I'll write my other entry later.
My father is an asshole. On Thursday after I came home from school, the front door was locked. I don't have a key, and my parents have always kept our door open when I get home. Well, we had over a foot of snow outside, it was 30 degrees, and my door was locked. I knocked and knocked on the front door, and then went around to the back and knocked on the back door,and then the kitchen window. No-ne answered and by this time I was shaking because I was so cold. I actually hid up in our treehouse just to get out of the wind. The treehouse was filled with snow, so I had to crouch over my books to keep from sitting in the mound of snow. After forty minutes, I noticed a faint light coming from the den. I climbed down from the treehouse and went over to our den window and peeked in. I saw a light coming from the inside of the door to our playroom downstairs. I start banging on the den window, and my father comes up the stairs two minutes later. "What are you doing outside?" he asked through the glass. I almost killed him. I started screaming at him through the glass. I went around to the front of the house where he had unlocked the door and was standing outside. I started cursing at him, and told him I hated him, and asked why didn't he open the door. (Hey, I was cold and very tired). He starts screaming at me, telling me he's going to crack my f**king face. (Nice right?).
I stormed inside the house and threw off my wet clothes. I changed, grabbed some money, and left the house. I honestly wanted to hit my father with a bat so badly...It's not even the fact that he left me outside that got me so mad. He didn't even apologize...He was sitting in the playroom with the door closed, and he's half-deaf to begin with. Yet, he's mad at me because I was rude to him. Honestly, the man is so blind sometimes....I slammed the door and stood outside for ten minutes, waiting to see if he'd come get me. I later found out he never even heard me leave. (Surprise surprise). I went to a nearby store and bought myself some crackers and juice. I walked around my neighborhood, crying, and trying to calm myself down. I know people who read this think I'm being childish. I mean, there are so many parents out there who abuse, neglect, or God knows does what to their kids. My dad just locked me out of the house and screamed at me. But, it bothers me anyway. My sister isn't helping matters. According to her amd my father they are never wrong.
Oh, and one more thing. To this person, you know who you are. I'm sorry if you thought my note was rude, but I honestly believe that anyone who intentionally cuts themselves on a regular basis needs therapy. I may not have much experience in this area, but you cannot be fully mentally stable if you do this sort of thing. If you don't like the truth, it's too bad. Don't write in OD.
Until later
Artist
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