Chillen Out in Plan B

Much needed much deserved. Wadda week. Listenin to some Days of the New ~ Shelf In The Room.....This week was humid and hot. Welcome to the Summer of 2017. Thankfully this week was lame. Sharon had her back surgery on Wednesday and she was home by 3 on Th. She is doing fine. At first the insurance denied it. It’s there job to do that. Then one day a week before they told her your going to have back surgery on Wed. Bam. I told her to do it because you don’t know how this insurance thing is gonna go with dick head in office. Her husband agreed and wella. Now days they don’t use stitches. They use glue. How awesome is that? She sounds good and is finally giving up smoking I hope.
Last Saturday I went to the PAVA art show. It was great. I bought a nice 3 set piece to go with the kitchen to hold the sponge, utensils and a small round one to hold the soup spoon or what ever. It is beautiful and cheap. $35 for all 3 pieces. Nice blue that plays off of the yellow in the tiles.
It has been weeks since Jerri died. My feelings of depression haven’t gone away just kind of became a ache that won’t go away. Feel so disconnected to what is going on around me. At work I am ok but home life is sucky. I can tell. Because I am not into doing house work by any means. I do just enough to get by which is so not me. I use to have NRG and get things done. Now. No. Not at all and it scares me some because this is not who I am. I do each day as I should but on my days off it is so hard just to go out in public. Going to the art show was nice and was home in an hour. Had a purpose there. I blow off everything. A dog’s birthday party ( ya I know but still....) going out when I should for basic needs like grocries…just go for basics and never think beyond a meal. I don’t know what to do with how I feel…I know how I feel just don’t know what to do with them. Writing helps. Thank Gawd.
I will give it more time. Hopefully it will solidify. In the mean time just keep on keepin on. No one prepares you for your sister dying. Parents are one thing. A Sibling. A Sister is another whole lot of what I didn’t know. It’s like “What the fuck do you do with this hot mess?” Going to chill and not be up too late.