Monochrome in The First Life

It’s quiet in my place, despite how I thought I’d fill it with noise, I have not.
It’s clean. I didn’t change that part he shaped....I do leave dishes overnight sometimes. And I’ve been getting drunk alone and leaving traces of my bad eating choices.
I can hear the city, the fireworks booming after a winning game, I hear voices echo in alleys nearby. There is a lot of life out there.
I walk through the village. Depending on when you go, you may watch over your shoulder. There are young people everywhere.. and older people on Sunday mornings.
I’m half a mile from our favorite restaurant. I haven’t taken advantage of that yet. I haven’t done much… really.
I’m breaking a heart without trying, drinking more than I should, and waiting for the edge to wear. I do a lot of walking my dog, he sleeps in my bed now and sheds everywhere.
All of the rooms echo…bare walls and lacking furniture. High ceilings don’t help.
I have to remember to turn the air up when I leave… And I’ve been buying more groceries than one person needs.
I have to make adjustments.
Liquor bottles don’t empty as fast. Despite the increase in consumption.
I sing out of tune
Talk to myself out loud.
Its been weird.
I haven’t felt grounded. Home has been swept away and I’m trying to belong again.

Last updated November 06, 2017