I’m so cozy! Kenny is looking for new music, I’m on my laptop in his room. It’s pretty lovely. Last night I had a nice game night birthday party, and Dakota, Andew S, Christina M, Elizabeth I, her Nick S, Shane, and Heather and Lono, all came. We played “Adult Codenames” and had lots of snacks. I made a cake that had a rainbow of fruits on the top, and pink and blue sprinkles on fluffy white whipped cream clouds. The cake was pink with raspberry coulis whipped cream, and had swirls of blueberry sauce on it. I got the idea from the horrible Starbucks drink. I wanted to make something good and gay and beautiful and tasty. I succeeded.
Things are pretty good. I need to figure out how to maintain strong friendships while still kicking ass at my job. I get sad often, because I feel like I should be paid more than $15 per hour. Ron agrees, Scott is an asshole that is trying to impregnate his wife and likes taking it out on me. They’ve only been trying for five months, I hope that works out soon. Scott’s wife Amber wants a baby so badly, and is crying all the time because she doesn’t have one yet. They’ve only been trying for five months. Lots of people try for years. Birth control pills really mess with the body, I guess.
I also need to either commit or cut the cord on my belly dancing class. I’ve been so wrapped up in work that I haven’t been advertising, or even working on my own dancing. I just get so discouraged. I know what I’d need to do.
-Print flyers that say “First class free” on them
-Take photos for those new flyers, possibly pay Jen G. to design them.
-Perform 30 second demos for the dance on Sunday, and post video on Facebook.
-Pass out flyers at colleges
-Create event for a month-long themed series, call it something like “Sexy Seaweed”
I know what to do. I think I’m just scared that if I do all those things, and still no one comes, then I’ve really failed. Right now, I get to say, “Well, I’m amazing, but no one knows it.” If I fail, then it’s, “Well shit, clearly I suck.”
I guess step one is new photos. I’m happy with my hair now, so I don’t have that excuse anymore. I guess I don’t have to commit to finding out if I’m a failure. I just have to do the next step.
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