I cannot get out of this slump. The usual ensues, I’m fine at work, around customers, around the office, etc, but once I get home, that’s all over and done, and it’s all down hill.
I’ve been having feelings like I’ve accomplished nothing. I know that’s not true. Logical me knows that. Emotional me… different story.
What makes this really weird to me is yesterday I found out I got a $2.50/hour raise. That’s really good news for me. Then this shit in my head ensues. I’m so beyond sick of this. I cannot deal with this stupid depression bullshit. It’s ruining me. It’s robbing my life of all the good I could possibly have. It’s robbing me of the joy I should be able to find - the joy I used to be able to find relatively easily.
I have the outlet to fix this shit. It’s time. No more fighting it. No more fighting myself. I’m over it. It’s time to make the call. I cannot do this on my own anymore. Time to get my head shrunk and get back on pills. Time to be more normal, or at least, less depressed.