College, etc. - 8/13/2006 in 2005 - 2007: High School

This has been the worst summer ever. No contest. Last summer, the most exciting thing that happened to me was drivers ed. This summer, the most exciting thing that happened to me was probably getting my wisdom teeth removed. And college visits, which are really not much better. At least last summer I got to see Julian periodically. The first I've seen of him in two months was in this week's local paper. No joke. A bunch of kids, including one "Julienne Miller," are now halfway across the country building houses. There are a few pictures of him, looking smilier than usual, but still not quite part of the group. In all of the pictures, he is wearing the shirt he got at that jazz band competition. So that, you know, in case you couldn't identify him, he has the word "jazz" all over him.

Yeah, so I am looking at colleges. In addition to the huge state school and small preppy school I saw last summer, I have now seen a small state school, a medium sized state school, a huge city school, and a smaller, less intense, less city-ish city school.

They are essentially all the same.

I don't want to go to college. More accurately, I don't want to apply to college. More accurately, I don't want to decide on a college. More accurately, I wish that there were some college that were so awesome that it would be possible for me to decide on a college without feeling like it's all completely arbitrary. Maybe all of these things are a little true.

To make myself feel a little better about the whole college thing, I have started filling out the common app. Yesterday, I wrote my short answer. I was pretty pleased with the way it came out. It had just the right ballance, I think, of righteous, spunky, and sincere. The only problem with it is... It's about something that hasn't happened yet. Well, I think that the assumptions I'm making are safe assumptions...

This year, I decided to start my own jazz band as a senior exhibtion. The band was open to all instruments, and I wrote and arranged music for the unusual combination I ended up with. I did this mostly because, as a flutist who has recently become a jazz flutist, I think that musicians should have the opportunity to experiment with different types of music regardless of their instrument. I also wanted the opportunity to lead and write for a large group. The most important thing I learned from this is that in real life, there are not highly structured guidelines. You decide that you want to do something, and then you do it. You cannot wait for an authority figure to give you directions and a rubric. It was interesting to organize something completely from scratch without being handed any guidelines.

Another, slightly sillier reason I'm proud of this essay is that it is supposed to have 150 words or fewer, and I used exactly 150 words. Count them if you don't believe me. It's true.

Now I just have to write the real essay. Damn.

Today I had a conversation with my mother during which she tried to politely tell me that I really need to work on how unattractive I am. It went something like this:

Her: So... Do you think maybe we should go to a dermatologist?

Me: No.

Her: Well I mean, I'm just thinking that maybe... There might be something else we can do about your skin.

Me: My skin's fine, it's just having a bad week. And I don't really care.

Her: Well if you don't care... I mean, it's not like it's a huge problem... I don't know if you've considered this either, but there are people who could do things to shape up your eyebrows a little for you...

Me: I like my eyebrows!

Her: Well I mean, they're not horrible, it's just... You do have thick eyebrows, and maybe somebody could thin them out a little bit...

Me: No! I don't want to get my eyebrows waxed.

Her: Have you thought about changing your hairstyle the next time you get it cut?

Me: No.

Her: Well, this one's just getting kind of old, and I mean, it always falls into your face...

Me: I like that.

Her: You always seem to be hiding behind your hair and your glasses... It makes you look like you're not very outgoing.

Me: I'm not!

Her: Why don't you ever wear your contacts anymore?

Me: Look, have you caught on that I really don't care that much about how I look? I mean, I care to some extent, but there are just so many things I can think of that I would rather do than go get my eyebrows waxed.

I cannot think of anything else witty to say. Um... The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Gallaxy is a good book. I have been reading it maybe a little too much and doing summer work maybe not quite enough.