Still falling... in Book of M...

In general things have slowed down. I think it was 2 weekends ago now that I didn’t really hear from him much, which isn’t unusual, but when he didn’t message me on Sunday it seemed weird. So I saw him on Monday and things seemed normal enough but when I got home I sent him a message where I asked if he wasn’t talking to me anymore but I was half jokingly. So he said he would talk to me about it tomorrow in person. I assumed I was getting the I can’t talk to you anymore speech. Then on Tuesday we never really talked which drug it out so I was upset. Then on Wednesday we finally sat down and actually talked. Basically his gf had gone through his phone and saw messages between us. First… the messages she saw were perfectly normal everyday conversation about if he got his ac fixed and letting him know that work had posted a promotional position that I knew he was interested in. According to what he said though, it wouldn’t matter what we talked about, she was going to fly off the handle period bc I’m a girl. Then after that, a chick that was at the bar the first night I hung out with him told his gf that we were all over each other and that he had asked her what he should do. The last half is just a blatant lie and we weren’t really all over each other. Yes we were leaning close to talk but it was a busy bar with live music so how else am I supposed to hear him? I already have a hard enough time hearing people especially if they aren’t facing me when we talk. So anyways despite H telling M’s gf that chick was lying she still flipped out. Whatever.

So we still talk but nothing sexual has happened since. I really want to kiss him.

So we talked and hung out at work for a while that afternoon and his gf calls and he very specifically tells her that he showed me his application and I helped him fix it and get it submitted. That kinda baffles me bc why would you bring me up to your gf who kinda hates me? But then again we do have similar personalities so maybe he was purposely trying to push her buttons.

Since then we still flirt. He still makes lots of sexual jokes. Like yesterday I gave him the other half of my sub from jersey mikes and after eating it he said “If I were single you would’ve gotten the D for that.” But we’ve also been talking more and having some serious conversations. So not only am I infatuated but now I’m also kinda emotionally invested. We had a conversation the other night about my infertility issues. And last night I was having an animal emergency and was freaking out and he talked to me on the phone and let me vent and tried to calm me down. I appreciate that. And he said he’d give me a hug on Monday when he sees me next.

The other day I also told him that if he decides to change his not single status that I call dibs.

I figure by now he probably thinks I’m crazy and I’m ruining it, but so far he’s still talking to me. And it’s not like I want to ruin his relationship or anything like that. I just honestly don’t think he’s that happy. He spent a good bit of time talking about his gf and how she’s basically intolerable when she doesn’t take her pills and they always end up fighting. Hell, on Tuesday he said that they had sex over the weekend but he didn’t finish.

Basically all I’m saying is that I think we would be good together despite how problematic it could be. I think that we could be happy together.

Last updated October 11, 2016