Nother Day in BookThree: Flight Log 2016

It is simply another day. Slept. Didn’t want to get out of bed for anything. Dragged my ass into the shower because it is a court day. Short court day. Heard a list of reasons why people shouldn’t be expected to stay sober… why meth and alcohol are the only things keeping them going. I get it. BUT we had a young guy, 22 or so, that keeps trying and so I’m going to keep giving him breaks. He spent 4 years in prison… so, all of his adult life… and he is trying to get back on track. But he keeps picking up driving under suspension charges… well, of course! He can’t get to work if he doesn’t drive. So we can’t just look the other way, but I’m not going to screw him out of every dime he has.

Now… now the nothing. Not The Nothing. Because there is Something. I have work to do. But I am tired. I am… stuck. All of my work will get done. Of that I’m certain. But I just… don’t feel like tackling it all right now.
Fantasy: What I’d like to do would be… go to the store to buy sodas, juices, and something for lunch. Go home, eat lunch. Play some video games and take a nap. Wake up and do some more work (work work). Go to bed.
Reality: What will actually happen… stay here and stare at the computer screen. Read some reports and write some idea down. When Cecilia leaves for her Dentist Appointment in 3 hours… wait 30 minutes and leave to hit the grocery store. Buy sodas and juices. Eat whatever I can at home. Play video games. Consider doing work, but realize I’m too tired. Continue to play video games until Wife comes home. Allow her to guilt me into not going to bed when I want to.

It is funny. This is one of the first times I haven’t felt two ways about something at this job. Typically, I feel “oh, wah… I should be working harder” versus “Fuck ‘em, fuck this place, fuck the whole thing.” Today? I just feel… “y’know what… I work. I push forward. Whatever.”

Oh, and it is official… this is THE middle of nowhere. I keep trying to find people, places, and activities that I would possibly enjoy… and the closest any of it is requires an hour drive (one way). (With the usual qualifiers of… yes, I know some people would need to drive 2 hours or 3 hours or more… and that some people would love being so protected from the hustle and bustle). I’m… not that guy. I’m the guy where, you drop me in downtown Chicago, IL and I’ll be fine. Drop me in downtown Barrow, AK… not going to do as fine.

And here’s me at my office for the last hour or so: