So I was dog sitting, right? The correct answer is; right. And I get this text, can you do another day, and I’m all like, right. Toldja that was the correct answer. So I was going to leave early but my phone gave me this severe weather watch than warning of a thunder storm, and like any sensible dog this dog, my dog, hates, I mean fucking hates, thunder storms.
So, I wait for the storm on this beautiful sun shiney day, right? The correct answer is still right (if you have to ask the answers always yes). Beautiful being a relative term. 84 degrees in Portland Oregon is beautiful, in mid Michigan swamp land it comes with a thousand percent humidity. The storm comes, white out sheets of rain and the treetops swaying like masts in a squall. The dog is terrified but trying to be cool. I keep him calm. Then the sun comes back out and the ground is steaming and I text that I’m going home. It’s a fifteen minute drive; two dirt roads and a freeway.
I’m halfway home and there’s some serious debris on the freeway. I get to the light to turn into my little town and it’s out. Four lights in a row are out. For all the manic driving everyone seems to undertand a light out is a fourway stop. All the cops and road crews and nobody is patrolling that high traffic corner, That’s not a portent, nothing happened there. A quarter mile ahead and the road is a lake. No problem just a lot of splashing water. More debris. I get home and the power is out. In a three story house all heat rises to the attic. My room is hot as hell.
I check to see that my mom is alright, though she knows the power is out is confused as to why her laptop works but the internet doesn’t. Reasonable confusion. I sweat a bucket or two before deciding It’s too damn hot and my car is air conditioned. My mom asks me to light a candle. So I light the safe ones from the winter power outage a few years back, figure it’s not as safe as I’d like, and though it’s only six o clock I decide going to get some flashlights was a good excuse to get in my air conditioned car.
I try going to my favorite hardware store. I run into a road block for the direct route, so I ramble through the neighborhood. I run into trees downed on the road, on cars on roof tops, barefoot children and their barefoot parents standing on the road looking at things in disbelief, a two mile switchback from tree covered roads and downed power lines road blocks and I get to a one way stop that nobody is navigating well. It’s all destruction and power outage, so I make it back home, sweat nother bucket and say fuckit right? The correct answer is fuckit, and I take a different route.
The hardware store is almost empty and their collection of flashlights is well stocked. Ten mintues of storm and it’s the worst devatasion I’ve seen here and I’ve seen more otrnados than I can count on my paws and feet, same with blizzards and thunder storms where lightening strikes the town, and I’ve never seen destruction like this ten minute summer squall did to this town. Our power was out for twenty four hours. The Board of Water and Lights predicted 48. The winter outage lasted nine days past when they were supposed to get power up during sub zero temps. But that was just ice weighing down lines and trees and was mild in comparison and the ice storm took a full day of pissing hell on us to get there.
I didn’t even see the storm. I mean I did, one town over, but that was just intense rain and thunder and a nervous dog that let me love on him to get through. It’s certainly the worst devastation I’ve seen that didn’t make national news.
The correct answer is right.
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