Monday, APril 11th, 2016 2:20 PM
I was unpleasantly woken up really early this morning because mother had to go to the hospital and she has pneumonia again so they admitted her to a room and she will stay the night. I feel my bad side won the fight last night because I don’t have any emotion today at all and I don’t feel it. I think it found some way to tie up and lock up my other side and it was a rare miracle that it managed to take its gag out last night and shout noooo! with all its might. That was actually the first time in my life I have heard two voices in my head talk at the same time, they don’t sound different then my actual voice so it’s just two different sides to me. One side telling me that I don’t have anything to live for or anyone to love and it being interrupted by the good side yelling with all its might. I guess the good thing is I don’t want to die today so.....
Anyway just thought whoever reads this might want an update. When I was sitting there watching my mom in her hospital bed the bad side just laughed at my good side and mocked it saying there was nothing he could do and that this body is under my (bad side) control now and forever and he has to sit there and watch. I do feel better today then I did last night.
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