Things are really good. I haven’t been angsty, so I haven’t been writing. I just got another raise today, so I now make $15 per hour.
I’m glad they didn’t wait until 2023 when they’d have to get me to $15, because it will be minimum wage and it will be illegal to pay me less.
I’m excited about my birthday party. I hope it goes well. I will provide amazing music and food, and so far I have 21 people saying they are going, and 28 maybes. I’m guessing there will be 30 people. 30 people I actually like. Go figure.
I’ve been teaching belly dancing since August. Students come in waves. Sometimes I have 8 people. Sometimes I have 1 person. It’s less exciting when there’s just one person.
Kenny is fantastic as ever. I still want a job with daytime hours so that I can see him more often. Life is too short to only fuck on Sundays. He’s a very kind person and he adores me. That works out well.
I started working out. Lifting weights gives me a sense of accomplishment. It makes me feel tough.
Sarah.... I’m less impressed with Sarah lately. She’s on an anti-establishment kick lately, which is fine, but she’s very misguided. She got herself a really butch hair cut, and then was surprised when she was nearly fired from her conservative real estate job. She thought that they were being unfair when they said that she now projects a different image than she did when they hired her.
Like, if you want to be anti-establishment, that’s fine. Lots of things are fucked up about society, I agree. You can get standard edgy haircut. You might find yourself working in a coffee shop, though. Or an art store. Some kind of specialized boutique, even. Just don’t be surprised when the mother in American Beauty doesn’t like your haircut and wants to fire you.
Don’t waste your energy being mad at a real estate office that doesn’t like your undercut punk hair. That’s like being mad at Denny’s for serving shitty quesadillas. You go to Denny’s for cheap pancakes, and real estate for houses. No one wants to buy a house from Marilyn Manson.
Anyway, I’m increasingly aware that Sarah is 21. When I dated her, she was pleasant, and appreciating all the fun new things I was introducing her to. Also, she was pretty. Now she’s gained some weight, has dumb hair, and is acting like a spoiled child. It’s a stage I went through, for sure. Realizing that life isn’t fair. Realizing that some people have more power than you.
I came out on the other side accepting that there are things that suck (patriarchy, racism, lobbists, etc), but we still have to eat. So I go to work. I dress strategically so that I can do my job effectively in the culture we have, and I slowly effect change inter-personally. I vote. I buy the non-free-range chickens because that’s what I can afford.
Teaching belly dancing is somewhat subversive. God forbid women appreciate and know how to move their bodies in sensuous ways that are fun. In groups.
Sarah hasn’t realized all of that yet. I mistook her lack of a personality for maturity, and now that she’s becoming more self-aware, she’s annoying and I’m no longer attracted to her. Oh well.
I was looking forward to fucking her again, kind of. She was always kind mostly a receiver. Kenny and I would go to great lengths to please her, and she didn’t know or didn’t care to reciprocate.
My room is messy. I haven’t felt motivated to clean it. Perhaps my father’s visit tomorrow will get me going.
Loading comments...