I am trying so hard to cope!
I am trying to be the best caregiver I can be.
I am doing whatever I need to do to make my hubby’s life comfortable.
BUT IT IS SO DIFFICULT!!!!!!!!
THE LATEST THING IS THAT MY HUBBY IS PLANNING TO DRIVE TO FLORIDA WITH MY DAUGHTER. HE WILL GO FOR TEN DAYS. I COULD FLY BUT I DECIDED THAT I’M NOT GOING. I FEEL THAT HE IS WRONG TO DRIVE DOWN ESPECIALLY FOR SUCH A SHORT TIME. HE NEVER DID LIKE FLYING. HE HAS INSURANCE FOR TEN DAYS.
MY DAUGHTER IS GOING BECAUSE SHE HAS TO DEFEND HER PHD. HOPEFULLY SHE WILL FINALLY FINISH AND GET HER PHD IN PSYCHOLOGY.
TODAY WE STAYED HOME. HE WAS TIRED AND IT WAS RAINING. I CAN HEAR THE WIND BLOWING VERY HARD.
A FEW DAYS AGO HE GOT A BLOOD TRANSFUSION. HE WAS A CHANGED MAN BUT I GUESS IT WORE OFF. HE IS EXTREMELY TIRED.
TUESDAY HE GOES FOR SOME SCANS. THAT WILL TELL US IF THE TREATMENTS HAVE BEEN EFFECTIVE. HOPE FULLY ON FRIDAY WE CAN GO TO OUR GP WHO WILL TELL US THE RESULTS.
LAST TIME I WENT TO THE DOCTOR WITH HIMHE GOT ANGRY WITH ME. I TOLD THE DOCTOR THAT HE WAS VERY TIRED AND MAYBE EVEN DEPRESSED. I WOULDN’T BLAME HIM AS SLOWLY ALL OUR FRIENDS HAVE LEFT FOR FLORIDA. THE LAST THREE GO THIS WEEK.
I ALREADY TOLD HIM THAT I AM NOT GOING TO FLORIDA. HE CAN GO WITH MY DAUGHTER. I THINK IT IS TOO MUCH WORK FOR SUCH A SHORT TIME. THEN HE COMPLAINS THAT I WILL WANT THE AIR ON AND HE WON’T. WE WILL HAVE ONE CAR FOR THREE PEOPLE AND FOR SURE I WOULD BE LAST ON THE LIST. I JUST HAVE NOTHING TO GO FOR. I ALREADY MADE UP MY MIND THAT I AM STAYING HERE THIS WINTER. SO FAR IT HASN’T BEEN BAD AT ALL.
I AM JUST SO FED UP. MOSTLY I GUESS BY STAYING HOME BUT ALSO THE STRESS IS GETTING TO ME. RUNNING BACK AND FORTH TO THE HOSPITAL...........................................................WORRIED ABOUT RESULTS.
MY NEUROPATHY IN MY FEET BOTHERS ME WHEN I HAVE TO PUT ON SOCKS AND SHOES. I WILL TALK TO THE DOCTOR ABOUT IT WHEN I GO. I THINK I WOULD LIKE TO GET FF THE LYRICA. I ALSO HAVE A RASH UNDER MY ARM?????????????????????????????
ANYHOW I AM JUST CRANKY AND FED UP. I GUESS I SHOULD GO BACK TO BED. I SLEPT SO MUCH DURING THE DAY.
TOMORROW I WILL GO OUT EVEN THOUGH I HAVE NOTHING SPECIAL TO GO FOR.
I WILL GO TO MICHAELS. MY DAUGHTER WANTS ME TO MAKE HER A WEDDING SASH. SHE ALREADY BOUGHT HER WEDDING DRESS. IF ALL GOES WELL WE WILL HAVE MY GRANDSON’S BAR MITZVAH ON SATURDAY MORNING AND MY DAUGHTER WILL GET MARRIED SUNDAY EVENING. I JUST HOPE MY HUBBY WILL BE UP FOR IT.
I HAVE STARTED TO THROW OUT A LOT OF BOOKS. I HAVE SO MANY AND THEY ARE STARTING TO LOOK SHOPWORN. I KNOW I WOULDN;T ENJOY READING THEM SO I AM SLOWLY GOING THREW THEM AND THROWING ALOT OUT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I JUST SEEM TO WANT TO UNBURDEN MYSELF.
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