Midnight Hour in 2015

I’ve got two nights of Lyft driving under my belt now.

Night 1 did not go well. I started at about 11 and hung out for a bit at the Fred Meyer parking lot in Beaverton. I lost my first two chances at a ride because of either my phone or the Lyft app acting up. I then headed toward Hillsboro and some of those bars. I finally got pinged for a ride and accepted it. The route was taking me back toward my apartment, so I wondered if Waze(the navigation app) was messing up and taking me home instead. I entered my apartment complex…and then it told me to stop. I confirmed being there, and surely enough, a dude came and got in the car, about 150 feet from my apartment. What are the odds of that?

He was certainly drunk, which he acknowledged and apologized for being so chatty several times. It was nice. I took him to a pool hall in Tigard and made 22.78 on the route. Not bad for a few minutes. Afterward I drove around Hillsboro and Beaverton, stopping by bars for a bit but finding nothing. I spent about 3 hours all in all that night. I got cancelled on with my second potential ride, after circling the bar for several minutes since there were multiple exits. As I was giving up, she came out of the bar and over to the car. Apparently her phone had died and they had found a friend to give them a ride. She was apologetic and even shook my hand. When someone cancels on you once you’re there, you can charge them 5 bucks, which you get all of, but I chose not to.

I didn’t get anything else that night, so I made 22 bucks in 3 hours. Not good. It could have been 27 if I was less understanding. I wondered if that situation was an example of my life in terms of interactions. Me, losing out every time on what I am reasonably owed due to being perhaps too understanding of others. I felt bleak and frustrated. Here I was, roaming the sometimes empty streets of these cities, feeling empty myself. Alone, struggling to better myself with yet again failure and no results.

Thankfully, the second night was a lot better. I tried for about half an hour at 730 downtown and got nothing. More frustration. I went home and watched Eddie Murphy’s Raw standup with Ella and JC. They went to bed and I bummed around for a while, then left at 1130 to try again. It took a few minutes, but once the rides started coming in, they kept coming in. I totaled 8 in 5 hours and made 120 bucks after Lyft fees. Most people were certainly drunk, but every passenger was cool and I enjoyed conversing with them. It gave me a little hope for this city and the people in it. I’ve felt my heart harden so much with everything I’ve been through or watched others go through the past year, all from how people around here treat each other. I can’t take off my coal-tinted glasses yet, but it makes me feel a little more optimistic.

I really needed it. To feel accomplished, successful. Knowing that my efforts are tangible and paying off. Feeling a little better about myself as a person after conversing effortlessly with a few random people, like maybe the people who have turned on me and snubbed me are just assholes and it’s not just me. The bitterness ebbs and flows but I can feel it inching closer. Maybe this will help it to subside for a while.

Inbetween the two shifts I slept for a while and then hung out with Anna. It was really good to catch up with her, as she doesn’t work with me anymore and we just started to become close before she left. I told her about Mayumi and all that has happened. We had a very, very long discussion one day after work, which helped create a unique bond between us, considering we didn’t know each other well. We alluded to our problems then, so it was nice to be honest about it this time. We were going to get sushi over here in Beaverton, but we ended up driving to near Mt. Hood, far east of Portland. Some friends of her boyfriend Gerrod wanted to find snow and chop down a Christmas tree. That part didn’t happen, but we did find snow. It had been a couple years since I had seen any in-person, and much longer since I had been out in it and actually appreciated it. The view of snow-covered trees in the distance and a white, foggy residue enveloping the earth. The beeping of snowplows in the distance. Parents loading their children up in sleds and pushing them down a hill. I can’t relate to any of it anymore, but I once could. It was like seeing my childhood all over again. It was a nice feeling. After we got back, I hung out with Anna and Gerrod for a while at the bar that is conveniently below their apartment. They are really cool, so I’m sure I will hang out with them more in the future.

Well, it’s a bit after 5 and I need to get up for work in about 3 and a half hours. The work Christmas dinner is after my closing shift, and then I’m going to try to squeeze in several more hours of driving tonight. This is my life. This is my city. It’s time to take control.