Cutter in Chunky giblets

So. Last night. Well.

First off, I Skyped a small bit with my baby. I love her. She’s great. She’s also completely oblivious to what I’m about to publicly inform her.

Last night I got drunk. Nothing unusual, but a bunch of people who I thought were becoming my friends made me feel like complete shit. They were rude. They made me feel very small just because I am homeless.

So I did something I haven’t done in a long time. I sliced the ever loving shit out of my arm. I have a whole bunch of cuts there, and some of them are deep enough that I will be scarred for life.

I’m sorry, K. I had to do it. I know it’s a pitiful, sorry, self-pitying thing to do, but I did it. I used to do it a lot. I haven’t done it in years. But it’s a part of who I am, so if you can’t deal with that, then do what you will.

I awoke to police giving me shit, so my day thus far hasn’t been incredible. But I’m upbeat. I needed to do it and now I feel great. It’s just the way it is.

I actually woke up with almost a full battery on my phone but nothing on my speaker, so I’m charging that fucker up. Then I’m going to go and get drunk. Then after that I’m going to try my hardest to get out of this town. The train station here is a joke; the trains leave here every two hours, which for a town this size is incredibly strange. I’m most likely to hitch out of town and see how things go. Unless I somehow make up the money for a train, of course, but fuck waiting two hours for a fucking train.

Met a couple who just came back from India. Good guys. They said they might have a laptop they can give me, so fingers crossed on that score.

I’m okay, guys. Don’t worry about me.