What the FUCK is going on? in Chunky giblets

Two nights ago my Windows Phone was stolen. That’s not even half of the bad news. Apparently, the email address I used with that phone has been linked to someone else’s account, someone here, and this person has accused me of hacking her account.

Well, first off, sorry about the angry notes I left you. It’s bad enough that my fucking treasured phone has been stolen, but now to be accused of something that I wouldn’t even have the first idea how to do in the first place kinda ticked me off. Second of all, no, I didn’t hack your email account. I have no idea what’s going on. My Lumia 800 was stolen. I don’t even give a shit about the phone but there were pictures there that I really didn’t want to lose.

I’m involved with someone. Kind of. It’s very difficult to put into words, so I won’t.

Anyway, the phone going, right on a weekend, was tough for me. I still have my piece-of-shit Android phone, so I can still go online and whatnot, but the Win Phone was cool, dammit - and it’s the principle of the thing, too. You don’t steal from me.

Anyway. I will find the guy, I know him to be a local asshole smackhead. He’s going to get his, but to re-iterate: I didn’t hack your email account. Don’t be paranoid. I don’t even know you. You left a note or two on my diary ocne or twice in the past - how do you expect me to even be interested in hacking you? I don’t know the first thing about you. Be serious. Even if I knew how to hack, and I don’t, by the way, no offence but you’re nothing to me, so why would I bother?

Fuck’s sake. First I lost a treasured possession and then I get accused of shit. Fuck you people in the ass. Seriously.