dignifif in Songs

Something recent, of recent occurrence has been that I’ve for the first time I can remember have been admitting to a lot of shit from the past. Shit things that I think have had an impact on a lot of who I am today.
I’m not much for relating to other people with our similar past tragics, maybe it’s come out of a re-vamping of confessional style for me. Lord knows that is definitely something that I appreciate, because, I’ve always had a problem with confession/sharing.
Like when I found out about having PTSD and then told everyone in the world, in inappropriate settings, about it.
Or like when I got back from LA and didn’t talk to anyone about it, or mention my PTSD ishes for like, a year.

BOTH UNHEALTHY

Also I can’t help but feel slighted when I share something and the person I’m sharing it with does a quick cut to a time in their life that they want to relate. It’s ok, I mean, it’s with their good intentions and honestly I feel like the jerk when I say that I feel slighted by it. They’re just trying to sy/e mpathize. I’m being all egoistic about my past issues.

But right, floodgate confessional seems better. Too much for people to try to relate, it contextualizes things, and, well, honestly it feels better, it feels like I’m just getting a lot of shit off my chest more than dangling a worm of pathos to see if I can get some coos and cuddles about it.

I do want to get over it though. Somehow thinking about it hurts. I’ve really gotta take a break from substances for a sec soon. Also I have Got to stop thinking I’ll eat the canned octopus because every time I crack a can and start eating it, I, it’s gross I’m sorry.