Many accomplishments today! in A New Beginning

  • May 2, 2015, 11:52 p.m.
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Honestly, I had gotten to the point where, aside from going to work and grouchily fixing supper, I was hardly doing ANYTHING....such was my depression and exhaustion level prior to Joey’s moving to his own place. But I can’t get over how AWFUL it seems, to say that! It isn’t about Joey at all, just about having all of the extra “stuff” that one other person living in the house can bring. The great thing is, though, that even though hyperparathyroidism can cause exhaustion, depression, and bitchiness, I still have it but in those three ways I feel SOOOO MUCH BETTER. It is so much like seeing the light again after being stuck in a dark tunnel for a long time. I am not nearly as tired!! Oh, having some energy again feels not just good but GREAT! I feel so darn proud of myself over the smallest things....but when you haven’t felt up to doing those things for a long time, you feel like they are big! Like last weekend I cleaned the bathtub! For so many months I’d been having Joey clean it. I was damn tickled over that, I tell ya! :o) And here’s something even smaller than that....THERE ARE NO SOCKS ON OUR FLOORS! I had gotten to the point where, wherever my feet got hot (at the computer, or table, or in the living room), I’d kick my socks off AND THERE THEY WOULD STAY! I didn’t even bother to pick them up when my feet got cold again; it was too much trouble! Instead I went and got another pair out of my drawer! Now it really means A LOT to me, that I no longer do that. I’d never done it before, and I don’t do it now! Our floors are sock-free!

I had also gotten into the habit of leaving the supper dishes ‘til I got home from work the next day. I’d rinse and stack them, but I didn’t wash them. I NEVER did that, before. I really hate a sinkful, or counterful, of dirty dishes. But I had one! Not anymore, though. I do them after supper because I am not too tired to do them after supper. :o)

Depression sure can sap one of the desire to lift a finger, and it is so easy to not even realize that one is suffering from depression. Of course, Joey was depressed too. He didn’t really act the way ya might think a depressed person would act. But depression is not a mood! He slept a lot. He didn’t go anywhere but to work. He did anything I asked him to do, but he didn’t do anything UNLESS I asked him. Lots of days, when he and Guinness were the only ones home, he didn’t walk Guinness. Now that he’s been working and has his car back and has even moved to a place of his own, he is feeling....well, REBORN! Like I am! :o) !!
He grocery shops, cooks, does his laundry, takes care of the lawn over there, and has joined a soccer league. Yaaaaay for both of us. Conquering depression is a blessing. It really does give a person her life back!

Anyhoozle....I am going to go for now. Joe and Guinness have been outside and I’ve been doing a heap o’cooking for our Beltaine celebrations tomorrow. Now I bet Joe would like a chance at the computer, and I want a shower. Happy Weekend, dear friends!

hugs and blessings,
Nicky


Deleted user May 03, 2015

Glad to have you back!

Ragdolls May 03, 2015

So happy for you! Glad to read you again!

thesunnyabyss May 03, 2015

I'm very happy for you both, depression does suck, the life right out of you,

big hugs!!

Deleted user May 04, 2015

I am so happy for both you and Joey! Depression is yucky (I have experienced it first hand)

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