don't mind me in --
- April 17, 2015, 8:27 p.m.
- |
- Public
I feel very unsatisfied in every way possible.
It’s really hard to keep going all the time, even if I tell myself that I don’t need certain things. I tell myself that my emotional, physical, mental needs don’t matter as much as everyone else’s and I push it down until it piles up and then I can’t keep it down anymore.
I go through these cycles and I feel stuck in it.
I also feel like if I don’t act happy or fake it, then I’m a burden. Nevermind that I have had zero time with Jacob or even to myself. I never get sleep. I don’t have any autonomy. It wears away at me. I wear away at myself.
I guess some things never change.
Last updated April 17, 2015
6 Comments
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The Thirsty Oriental ⋅ April 17, 2015
I hope things get better for you.
martian princess The Thirsty Oriental ⋅ April 17, 2015
They never do. I don't mean to be a downer. I mean, by all means I have a great life. I just never feel satisfied with it. And I feel incredibly guilty for it too.
I guess I am able to tolerate it for awhile, and then this happens. Tolerating life doesnt seem as good as enjoying life. I never enjoy life. Maybe it's just how I'm wired, unfortunately.
Deleted user ⋅ April 18, 2015
You and babies need a vacation up to MN :)
martian princess Deleted user ⋅ April 18, 2015
Agreed
Small Town Girl martian princess ⋅ April 18, 2015
Yes! Come to MN! Its getting nice here now! MN summers is why we stay here enduring those awful winters!