Doctor, Alcohol, and C Monday, October 03, 2005
Let's update, Shall we?
Tomorrow is my doctors appointment. I shall ask him about therapy. I will also talk to him about the pains I experienced in April and if he thinks they could be gall stones.
Last night I got trashed again. I blacked out for the last 2 hours. I remember only very small bits and parts of the night. Thank God Joe was there because I am sure that I would have tried to drive home. I don't ever want to be that drunk again. Joe had to carry my up the stairs to my apartment. (I don't remember that) He had to take my shoes off and carry me to bed. (I don't remember that) He asked me if I needed to throw up. (I don't remember that) He changed my clothes. (I kind of remember that) I passed out before he left my room. I also remember going to the 24 hour store with Wendy and Kyle. However, after I got back to Jeff's house I remember nothing except sitting on the couch and seeing Joe there. Oh, and I remember on the way home from Jeffs I started to cry about something to Joe. Then I just stopped crying all of a sudden. I asked Joe what I was crying about and he said that I said, "because I will never have what I need most." Then I guess I changed the subject. (I barely remember that) The night is a complete blur. I am embarrassed about it. Why can't I stop drinking? Why can't I control myself around alcohol? Could I become an alcoholic? I don't know. I just thank God it was Joe that took me home. He took good care of me. He didn't try anything bad with me and treated me with respect. Things could have been a lot different. I am lucky this time.
C and I are still talking. He invited me over tonight, but I am still feeling hung over/sickish so I said no. I really want to see him again. So hopefully the end of this week. We still talk every day. The other day we spoke for almost an hour on the phone. I like him a lot. However, I refuse to wait around for him to be ready to commit... which brings me up to my next update.
I put out a new dating ad. I e mailed one guy. I don't want to let go of C completely, but I can't wait for him either. Just going with the flow. Letting things happen.
I think that is all I have for now.
Her
Leave a Note
You're lucky you have good friends like Joe that would take care of you. It doesn't always work out that well.
I'm glad to hear you are still talking to C, he seemed really good for you. If nothing else you could always just be friends, right? [Solitary17] [p]
10/3/2005 9:02:51 AM
RYN: my birthday is Thursday the 6th...
Good luck with starting to date again after C:)
...I'm too chicken to start dating, which is why I like hanging out with my ex alot. [lostonthesea]
10/5/2005 7:26:23 PM
ryn: I do have dental insurance so cleanings are free and one set of x-rays per year are free. everything else is pretty cheap too - including braces. Well they're not cheap but ins. covers them.
I'm guessing he was holding his mouth because I've been nagging him for the past 4 months about covering his mouth when he sneezes or coughs. He probably just had a tickle in his throat at the time [Hawk.]
10/6/2005 9:46:01 AM
and was doing as he was told while running towards me. At least he's listening to me, right?
Are you doing ok over there? I sure hope so
xo [Hawk.]
10/6/2005 9:47:09 AM
ryn: He did retire in January of 1996 (I believe). [Hawk.] 10/7/2005 9:29:43 AM
yea, you never sent it.
But you were going through a pretty rough time and i thought it would be in bad taste to persue it any further.
Please send it to
Thanks!
[LastInLine] [p]
10/7/2005 2:36:14 PM
Where are you putting your 'ads'? [LastInLine] 10/7/2005 2:36:39 PM
yeah, i've kinda given up drinking, strangely enough..
is it snowing there yet?!? [lowerlight]
Loading comments...