4:34 pm There’s a few weeks to cover. So I left off where Katelyn deleted me. That lasted about a week. She got back to my messages (from Instagram) a week later. She added me back and sold me two tapes for $10 dollars. That was June the 26th. We continued talking until the July the 10.
See she celebrated the 4th on the 5th. Her sister pissed on her bed and I told her that maybe she did it because she was mad at her? Like how pets do it when they’re mad or something. She got mad and asked if I’m I was stupid, in all CAPS.
Cool. I asked her if she got it cleaned up? That sat on delivered for NINE HOURS. NINE. IN. EYE. E. Nine. She didn’t get back to me until the 6th around 5pm. She sent me a photo of her wall and I saved it. She said hi, and I said hello.
Was there something on your mind Katelyn?
We haven’t spoken all day…
What the fuck???
I told her that she had every opportunity to message me. She was mad and whatever I’d of said she’d of either gotten mad at me or ignored me. She tried to turn it around and gaslight me! She said that she was sorry she made me mad and I had to show her the screenshot of her saying sorry I was mad at you.
I went to work and we talked a bit, but she was out doing who knows what. I told her that I liked her and that I wanted to take her out. She said we would never meet.
It’s a two hour drive. I offered and she said she’d not comfortable meeting me. But you’re comfortable asking me for ten bucks to get some Sonic? You’re comfortable sending me cute videos and talking on the phone? You’re fine face timing?
I felt so sick I left work. My boss asked me what was my sickness and I told him the kind where a girl breaks your heart and you want to vomit, cry, and be left alone. I called in the next day. Everyone at work got mad at me but, whatever.
I woke up that Thursday, which was what? The 10th. I’m a bit lost since it fucked me up and I’ve been trying to numb the pain.
It all went down on Wednesday the 9th.
I left work around 11:15 pm and crashed at 11:45 pm. I was so broken I didn’t even charge my phone. I woke up at 9:30 am and my phone was at 25 percent. Katelyn sent me a message and remember, I didn’t reply to her after she said she didn’t feel comfortable meeting me.
I got a picture of her bedroom wall. I explained that my phone was almost dead and that I wanted to talk, but right now I want to hit the gym so I need to charge my phone. She deleted me and blocks me on Instagram.
That’s when I called in that day and everyone at work got mad at me. My store lead messaged me and asked if of be coming to work. So yeah, I had to be there.
My friends thought I’d kill myself and I was close.
This Tuesday we all went out to Chilli’s where I got fucked off their drinks. They were strong and I only had 3. I don’t know what patron is but that shit tasted like bad cough syrup. Three drinks in and my head is hanging on my chicken tenders Nashville hot platter. My friends paid for drinks and meal. It had to be around $70 dollars.
Since then I’ve been feeling like shit. But everyday is a little better.
Work is slowly getting better. One of the new guys gave me the new Superman movie on a flashdrive. It was such a good movie. The fun song was good and that ending song that I had to look up. It said it is by Teddybears and Iggy Pop. No clue who that is, but is this the SAME Teddybears as the “Still Alive” Teddybears remix of Lisa M. from Mirror’s Edge? THE Teddybears?
Or is that the name of the remix?
There’s a cute girl at work that, I don’t know why she has been looking at me but I asked her what her name is. I think it is Darlene? Car-Lean? Char-Mean? Car-Lee? Whatever the fuck it is. I asked one of my friends what’s her lore and she told me she’s dating this ATC dude that looks like he needs a bath. Her words. And now that has stuck because I can’t not unsee it or whatever. Because I totally see it now.
I asked another girlfriend of mine and she didn’t know who and I had to say, the guy who looks like he needs a bath and she INSTANTLY knew who it was. Oof.
That made me wonder what my lore is and how I am seen or known? I’m not Flock of Seagulls there. It better not be I need a bath too because I shower everyday.
And that has been my life since the last time I wrote in here.
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