Hello 2025 in Journal ◇ 2025

Yay, 2025. Started off sad buts it’s fine, gof a interview soon.

Manuel’s been talking to me more about his religion and I can admit I feel sad, like Jesus or God is number one and Mari is number 2. That’s fine in all, I guess that’s how religious people work and I gotta just know my place.

I published another book so yay. Ads cost lots. I’ve been seeing Manuel get publicly you know judged for dating me and it makes me, sad. And guilty. I’m hesitant to talk to people because I feel or well know they’re judging.

It’s lonely and I feel sad sometimes but I just try to be a girlfriend and ignore everyone. I know people don’t really care about or want me around. It’s kind of easy to accept that now. Once I save I’m gonna move away.

Go back to school in another state and write more books. Maybe query some. Be happy for once and smile everyday. Everyone will be impressed and love me and want to talk to me. That’s what I tell myself every single day.

I don’t really believe it. But it’s nice to tell yourself, when you’re old and ugly like me.