I didn't steal your boyfriend in The OpenDiary (OD) Days!

I didn’t steal your boyfriend - 10/25/2005

<font color="#cc99ff">Time for an entry, quickly before I go to bed.  Gotta love that song!!</font>

<font color="#cc99ff">I’m listening to "Sleigh Ride" by Billy Gilman and Charlotte Church.  It’s just funny hearing her voice considering how much of a bad-ass she’s become.  Last picture I saw of her was her sprawled over the bonnet on a car drunk hahaha.  No longer the voice of an angel, although it’s great she’s gone mainsteam!</font>

<font color="#cc99ff">Anyway back onto something so you guys wilol actually know what I’m on about.  Things have been interesting lately, and I haven’t had a chance to write in a few days.  Worked all day Saturday and I was so glad that was over.  It is now Monday night (well Tuesday morning cos it’s past midnight), and I’m thinking I have to work today grrr.  Gosh the weekend go quick.  Well actually this one wasn’t too bad.  I went out clubbing Saturday night, but I got really depressed cos i got rejected from two of the clubs we tried to get into.  I started crying, trying to hide it from the group of mates I was with.  Then we had to run into more people I knew, and I just refused to make eye contact.  I think it’s mainly the fact that I feel I let my friend’s down, cos if I can’t get into a club on account of what I was wearing, then it ruins their fun too.  And I actually dressed to TRY to get into the fucking club - and yet I was still told I was "Too casual.." - If I wasn’t such a nice perso I seriously woulda been pulverising the bouncer with a Stanley knife right in the throat.  Haha that’s a bit sadistic isn’t it, but it really pissed me off and upset me, cos this isn’t the first time this has happened, and when you actually make an effort to dress up nice (Well so I thought) to get into a place, and you still get rejected, basicially it makes you feel like shit.  We went to RG’s and Dooley’s, two places I could get into, and I found out that Luke was at the beat that night, so I said goodbye to my friends so that I could head to the beat to try and see him.  On the street walking toward The Beat, I heard a voice call out my name.  I turned to see a car pulled up alongside the street, and it was Lauren!  I near panicked.  I pretended I was happy to see her, and she yelled, ‘jump in!’, so I did.  I dunno why, but I’m not really one to be rude, so I did.  I can’t stand Lauren.  She’s the bitch who i saw dancing at The Beat one night and then the next day dissed me for being gay, questioing my motives.  Fucking hypocritical slut as far as I’m concerned.  So I jumped in and she sped around the block.  I was a mixture of confused as to how I had just been snatched up off the street, and pissed off behind a friendly smiling face.  She looked like she was on drugs, like she had a smile that wouldn’t quit and her eyes were darting everywhere.  But apparently she had just preached in tongues or something, so I can understand her high - it was a spiritual high.  She was telling me she was annointed with the blood of Jesus and I was too.  She finally found a park and said she had to go inside to get some bartenders phone number.  I was just glad to get away from her.  She gave me a card to her church and told me to come along the floowing night.  Like fucking hell!  God I hate being nice to people I can’t stand.  She goes, "I think you took me to wrong way with the email I sent you" - I said, "Yeh you really hurt me".  Damn bitch.  I’d already had a shit night by not being let into certain poshy wanker clubs, and then I had to run into a mortal enemy like her.  GOD!  Anyway, I was too upset after that and Luke wasn’t replying to my SMS’s, so I walked to the train station and caught the last train home.  I was a wreck.  I sent Kat a message saying I was going home and she rang me, cos they were all off the the Nomanby for more drinks, and she was tryin to convince me to get off the train and come back into Roma Street so they could cheer me up.  But I was too far gone.  I was pretty depressed.  I had a crappy night.  Just what you need after a 38-hour week.  The most exciting part of the whole night was the train trip home.  Two girls sitting in front of me were talking to some drunk straight guys on the opposite seats of the carriage we were in, and I overheard them saying they worked for Woolworths (Who I work for), and Krystal and Kimberley (I found out their names were) turned around and said something to me, cos they were all chatty and I was just sitting there.  So I said, "Did you say you worked for Woolworths?’ I said, ‘cos so do I!’ - so that gave us something in common to talk about.  Krystal yelled out across the carriage, "Hey Sarah!  This guy’s name is Matt and he works for Woolworths at Chermside!!’ - God she was loud hahaha, and it was pretty embarrassing too, knowing everyone in that carriage woulda heard that information.  So that cheered me up a little.  I got home and went to bed - i needed to sleep that off.</font>

<font color="#cc99ff">Next day i got messages from luke saying his phone had died at the beat, and he’d had a really good night.  He reckons he met the hairdressers for Natalie Brathsingswaite, singer in Rogue Traders.  So that’s pretty cool!! hahaha.  I know that cos he came over last night.  It was really good to see him.  We hung out heaps and he stayed the night.  I admitted to him that I’d been thinking of him all week and that I’d gone to msg him a few times and then stopped cos that was against what he wanted.  So we’re talking again.  I so want him back.  I do, it’s just the things that don’t make sense that get in the way.  Him moving to Toowoomba being the major one.  And I have to tell Aaron I just wanna be friends with him.  Although I realised that a few weeks ago now that i got to know him better.  But Luke loves spending time with me.  The SMS’s and body language have changed back to the way it used to be, and how much he really wants to be with me again.  I guess to start with I thought it was just us not living together, and that was having a big toll on him, but I think he’s realising how much I actually did for him.  I mean I have to say I was hoping he would, cos I did feel underappreciated a fair bit sometimes at the old place.  We are in two different houses now, in two different suburbs.  I’m closer to his work, so he usually brings his clothes over and heads straight there from my house the next morning, which makes sense.  I’m just scared of crashing and burning I guess, so I’m holding off from doing anything.  But I miss him, I do, that’s obvious.  When he walked in the door yesterday and was leaning against the wall, when we were talking to my new housemate Nev, I was just looking at his face, thinking, ‘God he is so unbelieably beautiful’ - he really stuns me.  I still don’t know what I did to catch the attention of such a gorgeous guy.  Who knows what will happen.  Gotta get rid of a few obstacles in my life before I do anything, and he does too.  And I am not letting this go without letting him know that him moving to Toowoomba is gunna be a real strain, especially with the price of fuel these days.  But I totally understand and respect why he’s doing it.  One of his little brother’s has a brain condition, and it scares Luke so much sometimes, he just feels it’s so unfair that he has so much in life, and that his brother won’t ever get to have the same benefits he does.  Like i said, heart of gold that guy.  Plus our history together.  You can see why I’ve been thinking this over so much the past week.</font>

<font color="#cc99ff">I just got back from the city, after hanging out with my mate Lindsay.  Had a good laugh as usual, and it was pissing down rain haha.  Luckily I was a prepared gay guy and I brought my umbrella. :)  i felt weird bringing it, but I’m glad i backed my judgement, cos it sure came in handy walking from the valley to the train station to go back to the city :)  We had dinner at the Coffee Club and i shouted him his meal.  Played him a game of pool in the city too, I won :)  But then again he’d never played before - but did really well for a first-timer!  I spent so much money today.  I was bored today so I went for a drive after Luke left for work and I ended up going to Caboolture, Burpengary, almost Caloundra, and shopped at a few shopping centres I could find, then settled on Westfield Northlakes, cos I’d never been there before.  Not a bad place.  Spent a fair bit of money on music CD’s and a storage unit cos I’m out of space, and then I drove to Bracken Ridge to do my shopping at the new woolies there.  I bought the Golden Girls DVD’s, cos that was the cheapest place I’d seen them!  $27.95 each, so thought that was pretty cool.  Plus got my 5% discount off my total order.  Oh well it was something.  And I did see Mick there.  He was working.  I wasn’t sure until they called his name over the P.A haha.  He’s a guy I used to date.  I was going through the checkout when he finally spotted me, and said he was doing job interviews, but would speak to me later.  I just got a msg from him then.  I can’t believe how young everyone of the staff is at that store hahaha.  Was good to see him, he’d straightened his hair or something, so it looked really different to when I saw him last!  Looked good!  I paid for my order and came home.  I just got home from the city with Lindsay.  I have to work a full day today instead of my usual half day cos of Stocktake on Wednesday!  But at least i’ll get a half day on Thursday, and I guess that’ll be a refreshing change.  I jsut hope this week goes quickly.  I’d actually like for just one weekend not to do anything, but that just never happens hahaha.  I get bored too easily if i don’t do anything.  Oh well I’m happy now, made up for Saturday night.  And it was great to catch up with my mates I hadn’t seen in ages, even if it was impossible to hear each other over the loud music.  I think I prefer house parties to pubs, cos straight pubs are just so boring to me haha.  At least at The Beat, they have cool music.  But I never made it there did I?  Oh well, maybe next time, and it’s just as well cos Luke’s slutty ex boyfriend Jay was there.  Oh that’s not me being mean, it’s true.  Then again, who there isn’t.  Haha I’ve been hanging with Lindsay too much - we bag out all the gay guys - his housemate being a perfect example of the Brisbane whore - eww he’s so gross - Lindsay’s kicking him out, he’s had enough.</font>

<font color="#cc99ff">Lindsay was telling me today that he sent a printout of Grant’s gaydar profile to Grant’s father.  I cannot WAIT to hear the results, cos that cunt seriously needs to die.  I know that word is horrible to any females reading this, but he’s the guy who sexually assulted Luke, so I think I have adequate permission to descibe him as one.  I jsut wish I was a fly on the wall at his house when his dad throws him through the window.  Hahaha, good on Lindsay, he can’t stand him either.  I only wish I knew who the guy was.  Would be interesting, and I hope he’ll get what’s coming to him, which it seems like it will.  Karma’s finally caught up with you my friend.</font>

<font color="#cc99ff">On that note, I’m off to bed.  I love you all!</font>

Notes: --------------------------------------------------------------------

sweetdreams :O) [♥Redflash24] 10/24/2005 12:12:38 PM

I’m sorry I haven’t been round much, juggling OD & real life is crazy. I’m glad u & L.r on speaking terms again, its sweet :) Yeah I’m up late too, I’m going to bed now. Hope u have a gr8 day tom. Take care & ((hugs)) [^v^SuGaBaBe^o^] [p] 10/24/2005 12:28:41 PM

DAMN that was a long entry. And rejected from a club? I’d cry if that ever happened to me!

:) [CollegeDude84] 10/24/2005 12:37:24 PM

wow you always cover a lot! lol
glad to hear you’re doing good! -j [J HENRY] 10/24/2005 12:38:36 PM

i second everything collegedude says! [LegallyGay80] 10/24/2005 12:51:36 PM

Wow…sending it to his dad? That’s harsh…but if he assaulted Luke, then not harsh enough! =)

Alot’s been happening! I’ve never been to a club where they turn people away based on dress. I guess I haven’t lived yet…=) Wanker clubs…when I was in Ireland, they used the word “wanker” all the time. Great fun.

I get a feeling that you and Luke still aren’t ready to move on. I wonder… [yellow_bull] 10/24/2005 1:37:38 PM

(cont.)…what mine and J’s relationship would be like if we moved out of the same house. He admitted this weekend that he hates the “settled” feeling that he gets, like he’s already in a married relationship. Yikes…anyway.

A while ago, I made a pact with myself to treat people without a fake facade. And I feel so much more at ease. I just fee less like a phoney. Anyway, have a great night! [yellow_bull] 10/24/2005 1:43:16 PM

Oh sh*te man, it wasn’t that bad, you shouldn’t have felt bad on our account or anything, there are heaps of clubs and pubs anyway. The only annoying thing was the others standing round on the street corner - I just wanted to get moving and get to somewhere!

Arghh! You’re too nice to wankers! If I’d met Lauren (nearly!) I would have cut her down for the bag of sh*te she is on your behalf. [The_Blind_Archer] 10/24/2005 1:52:31 PM

They probably rejected you because you were too pretty. ;)

Take care, [October Boy] 10/24/2005 5:30:47 PM

Hey. Check out “Brendan and Mock Trial” whenever you get a chance. You’ll be a happy man!

Talk to you later, and screw this Grant kid.

-James [Beez] [p] 10/24/2005 6:05:50 PM

QUICK entry? ;-)
if i’d seen you crying i would have hugged you. i’m sorry you got rejected. what a couple of assholes.
sending that guy’s gaydar profile to his dad was HORRIBLE . . . just AWFUL! even if he sexually assaulted luke, that’s below the belt. you have to be better than the people that hurt you. send me a link to the profile?
i hate being nice to people i hate too.
<3,
[Prince Zidane] [p] 10/24/2005 6:18:31 PM

Bummer that u had such a crappy night. U ended up getting to spend time w/Luke which is way yummie! Kewl for u! Hope your day goes well and that you have a kick ass weekend! :O) [3daygomer] 10/24/2005 6:45:33 PM

How they gonna turn a cute boy like you away from a club? Damn, some people have no sense.

Thanks for comiserating with me about missing ex-boyfriends. I needed the encouragement. :-)

Jesse [newbluechampion] 10/24/2005 6:54:09 PM

I’m sorry your Saturday night was so sucky…Hope you have a good week! [broken.wings.] 10/24/2005 7:04:17 PM

Billy Gilman?? Gawd I have not heard him since ‘One Voice’, as for Ms. Church, she has come out much like Nicky Webster, I saw NW on the front page of FHM Magazine is a fish net number and a very naked centre fold hugging her pink bits around a guitar…

And by the way that wasn’t a quick entry. LOL!
Being not let into a club? How does that work? I would have thrown someting at him at least [tisk] 10/24/2005 7:09:46 PM

Well ,, just wow [The Cherry] 10/24/2005 9:11:40 PM

[tankerbrat8386] 10/24/2005 9:30:17 PM

RYN: Yeah those two are hotties, and that was a totally different Pete in the pics lol. That was one of Shaun’s mates in the pics, I haven’t seen other Pete in agessssss :(:( [SinderellaX] 10/24/2005 11:54:50 PM

damn fool, a “quick” entry before bed....lol. [C-Dub85] 10/25/2005 3:17:51 PM

hey, that was one long entry…i’d probably cry too if i was ever rejected from a club. i love reading your diary, theres always so much in each one. and i love you too! :~) take care [PetiteAnge] [p] 10/31/2005 11:25:30 PM

Last updated October 12, 2014