Are you trying to reconnect with people who no longer exist? in Magician Card

Those people from your past. The ones that you have fond memories of, and maybe you’re like me, someone who spent a lot of time in isolation. I spent a lot of time staying away from people, missing out on more memories, ....or did I..... Isolation has it’s benefits. I am who I am today because of every little thing that’s happened in my life, including the time I spent in isolation from others. And I’m quite happy with who I am.

But occasionally I find myself trying to reconnect with an old friend. Someone I remember having a good time with. But things aren’t the same. And they never will be. Stop chasing the past because the past no longer exists. The people you grew up with? They aren’t the same people they are now. The person you were in the past also no longer exists.

The only thing that exists is the here and now, the present. It’s the only real thing.
And when I came out of isolation this hit me the hardest.

The people I grew up with are not the same. I am not the same. We are not the same. While I might have paused my life to isolate myself, it doesn’t mean others did as well. Keep this in mind if you push others away because you might regret it one day when you decide you no longer want to push others away, that you want to reach out, only to find that things aren’t the same.

The best friend you grew up with, things are awkward now. It’s like you outgrew eachother(because you did) and no longer have the same interests. They have a kid to top it off. The other friend is on the other side of the country because life went on and so did they and now they are doing their own thing far away from you.
Maybe even a few of them have passed already. There is that one friend who went down the ‘bad’ path and is either in jail, prison, or on the streets using drugs and homeless.

Nothing is the same. And a part of me realized maybe it’s time I stop chasing the past so much for this reason. I feel I time travelled. I’m still stuck in highschool in my mind, because that’s where I left off, where I isolated myself. And now that I’m out of my own bubble, it feels like I’m playing catchup with myself. My memories, my thoughts, where everyone should sit in my life, the role they play in my life(if any), and the role I play in others.

And now I’m here.

Instead of trying to reconnect with these people who honestly just no longer matter as much, it might be best to reconnect with hobbies I used to enjoy when I was younger, watch things I enjoyed watching. That’s the best way to reconnect with the past at the most.

The other things though? Why try to reconnect with people who no longer exist? I guess I’m writing this maybe because someone might feel the same maybe. And it’s a good reminder that the people we once were no longer exist. Neither do the people you used to know. Everyone changes, evolves, and moves on with life.

And if you do try to reach out. Maybe it can go good. Or maybe you will feel more isolated because you realize that things are definately not the same and they never will be. Learning to be okay with that and live in the present is the only solution we have.