Are You High? in These Foolish Things

I saw a job posted on LinkedIn several days ago at a company I was very interested in about a year and a half ago. In fact, I’d previously been contacted by a headhunter about a role that was my DREAM job and I’d gotten through two interview stages. Turns out they never hired for that role. I found that out today because I was contacted by the HR Director of that company and she asked if I could speak with her today.

So we had a call at 3pm.

Now, normally these calls are between 15 and 30 minutes long. They are introductory calls where HR just wants to get a feel for you to see if you’d be a good fit and to make sure the salary ranges are in line with the expectations.

So fine and good, right? I’d have a quick call during a break in my work today.

Turns out, the bitch talked nearly non-stop for two hours. I swear to god, I think she was high on cocaine. I’ve never experienced anything like it! I mean, we had a fantastic rapport, but I was barely able to get a word in edgewise, and the chatter was nearly frantic. And she kept sniffing like she was totally coked up!

By the end, I had to pee so badly that I took the phone in with me to the bathroom and did one of those pees where you sit at the very front of the seat and try to barely squeeze anything out so the other person can’t hear the tinkle!

She asked me my salary expectation so I asked her the range and she told me that she really didn’t have one because this is a newly-created position, so I told her that when I’d spoken to the recruiter, the budget number was $$$$$ [high-end salary for this role] and so that’s what I would be expecting for this position - especially since they hadn’t filled that other position.

Lady Cocaine said she wasn’t sure, but she definitely wants to make sure that I get to speak to the co-owner (to whom I’d be reporting) because she knows that I’m such a good candidate that she’s ready to draw up the job offer (YES, SHE SAID THIS!!).

I don’t know what to think, and I was angry that she took two hours out of my workday and now I’m going to have to make up for that lost time tomorrow. I should have done it tonight, but I’m not in the mood. I have this big strategy presentation and I’m just blocked. Next week is going to be a killer.

Anyway. Weird, right? A two-hour intro call?
Bizarre.
GS