Events since Thursday have really changed my mood. I was on a super high following a nice two weeks off work and a wicked trip up to the Far North of Scotland.
I had a LGV category C assessment on Thursday. Whilst, the assessment went well in my opinion there is no doubt that I struggled with the size of the vehicle. At the moment I am booked on a 5 day training course with my test on the 6th day. However, I feel that I may struggle to be confident and competent on the test day. Additionally, even if I pass the test I will need to be a competent driver for driver assessments at job interviews.
Ultimately, my priority is to gain a license that can open up new employment doors to help me escape my existing job. Therefore, I have decided to down scale my plans and go for the C1 license. This is a tough decision as a lot of people say the C1 is a waste of time. However, from my prospective it is cheaper and easier to pass the exam as it can be done in a van rather than a lorry, locks in my initial driver CPC qualifications that at present has a 2 year expiry date and gives me vital experience of working in road transport, driving for a living and driving vehicles larger than a Vauxhall Corsa! The other potential advantage of completing the C1 licence is that it leaves a possible avenue to find a company that will pay for me to obtain further license qualifications.
Annoyingly, I let myself sign a contract for category C training immediately after my assessment drive, when I was pumped full of adrenaline, and I have paid a £140 deposit! I now need to make sure that I can cancel that contract without incurring any further liabilities to that organisation. Unfortunately, I have most probably lost the £140.
Events on Friday really annoyed me. I had a friends wedding to attend. I went to the wedding venue at the scheduled time. However, I felt like a spare part being on my own. Additionally, I felt under dressed for the event as I didn’t wear a tie nor wear a suit jacket. That was an annoying situation as I went shopping on Thursday to purchase these items but couldn’t find anything suitable or in my size. Buying these two items are priority purchases now. However, this event has highlighted my general lack of decent social clothes/fashion. Given my feeling of being under dressed and the awkwardness of attending a wedding on my own I bottled it and did a runner before the ceremony. I feel bad as they paid for me to have a meal but I just couldn’t stick it. The prospect of being on my own during a meal and having to make small talk with other people just proved too much.
So the main conclusion is that being single sucks as I had no one to keep me company during the wedding and no one to help guide my dress sense before hand!
I am back at work tomorrow after a two week break. I need to change my mindset towards my job as it is very negative at the moment. I have convinced myself that I am going to hand my notice in soon. This is not a good mindset to have. I need to change that. Focus on the attendance and the money side of things and complete my job. After all I have no intention of moving jobs until I find a suitable alternative or the situation at present improves.
On the fitness side I have brought some scales to weigh myself. I am currently registering at a hefty 18 stone. I have decided to develop a power-walking routine as I find jogging too difficult to fit into my life. I will see how I perform with this routine and see if it makes any difference.
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