The ongoing Niece drama: Hashing out my reply. Opinions appreciated. in The Big, Blue, House. Year two.

I ramble a bit. The message is at the bottom. My apologies.

I’m just putting this here for a sort of peer review before I send it off. I know that no matter how I word it, her interpretation will be bad. My hope is that maybe, one day, if she is ever sober and sane, (however infinitesimally slim that chance may be at this point), it might sound caring and concerned, in retrospect. Don says that I should just lie, and tell her that he’s against her coming here, so she’ll still like me. But I just detest lies, unless they’re absolutely necessary. And goddamn it, she needs to get help, not to be enabled.

~~~•~°~☆~SIDETRACK, I apologize~☆~°~•~~~

I had an Aunt with schizophrenia, who stayed with my parents and myself a few times when I was growing up. She always thought that some of our family members were trying to do her harm, or that she had ghosts, or teenagers on her roof injecting poisonous gasses into her vents.

When I was about twenty-two, my Uncle’s long time girlfriend came home from work to find her sitting on her front steps. At that point she, (the Aunt), was living in a trailer court in the same small town as all of her brothers, her youngest son, and lots of cousins. Her son regularly brought her her prescriptions, and she thought he was replacing the medication with poison. So she’d gone to the Uncle’s girlfriend’s house to meet him, with an ice pick in her hand, to “get him before he gets me”.

After that, my Dad and two of his brothers went to the sheriff’s office, and had her committed. It took two family member’s signatures. I gather it varies by state. I never saw her again, though my Dad and her other brothers visited her. They said she was “out of it”. As in, there would be no point in me driving all the way across the state. It was terrible.

So with my Half Sister telling me that Niece accused her middle son, who’s only fifteen, of wanting to kill her, I see echos of my long dead Aunt. - Oddly, no, they’re no relation. The Aunt was my biological father’s sister, and the Niece is my Mother’s granddaughter through her first husband. She’s technically my half-niece. My father, and thereby his sister, arent genetically related to her at all.

Not a great gene pool we have in this family, and apparently we’re inclined to share our DNA with other, equally weird people. It’s probably for the best that I never had kids. (Joking, but not entirely.)

At any rate, my parents had lots of family around to call on when my Aunt was acting strangely. My Father was a relatively burly guy, and said Aunt was a comparatively short, feminine woman. In a worst case scenario, he had options.

I don’t. The Niece, even as thin as she’s become, is still heavier than I am, (she’s built like her father), and my remaining family is scattered across the country.

And the Aunt was never an addict.

~~*~•~°~*ੈ✩‧˚༺☆༻*ੈ✩‧˚~°~•~𐀔*~~

Okay. The reply, attempt number one:

I love you. Above all, I want you to know that. I remember our times in Tennessee, and how great you were with me, when I was being bullied at school every day, and I remember how you helped us when we were homeless and hungry. Your situation absolutely breaks my heart. It truly does.

But you need help beyond what I can offer you right now. You need to get through a rehab program, first and foremost. I’m so sorry, but it’s true. I’ve seen what hard drugs do to people. And I see it in your pictures. I love you so, but you’re sallow, and it hurts me so much to see that. It’s affecting your body, aging you, and it’s affecting your mind.

Again I am so, so sorry. But no one in our family is trying to do you any harm. I just can’t lie, and you need so much to just go see a therapist. Just any therapist. Just hear what they have to say. I am literally begging you.

You’re the kindest, sweetest, person in our family. I think more of you than just about anybody. But right now, until you’re clean, and responding to psych meds, frankly you’re frightening me.

You never stay anywhere long, and you think people who love you want to hurt you. I’m terrified that you’d come here, and eventually decide that we’re trying to harm you. It’s genuinely scary.

I know you say you’re getting better, but your picture, and messaging me this way, show that’s not entirely true. And it breaks my heart.

I would give my left arm to have the girl I knew back. Please, just get into rehab, and see a therapist.

~~*~•~°~*ੈ✩‧˚༺☆༻*ੈ✩‧˚~°~•𐀔~*~~

If she replies trying to bargain, I’ll be back with more drama for you wonderful and patient people to help me navigate. I genuinely appreciate you all.

Any opinions greatly appreciated.

Last updated August 30, 2023